I was recently unemployed for six months between jobs. I spent a good chunk of my savings while looking for more work, before I finally landed a job in a retail position, first ever job in retail, after previously working short contracts for a mid level corporation with thousands of employees. I'm now at a company with less then 30 employees. I've taken a huge pay cut, but I wasn't going to last more than a couple of months on the money I had.
Cards on the table I got this job because I tangentially knew the manager at the store. I was up front about my mental health, my near inability to work mornings due to insomnia, my capacity to only work two to three days a week at this stage. It's all fine, myself and the manager get on quiet well. I'm traveling an hour for this job on a bus, but there's a second store ten minutes walk from my house which I did land a shift at covering one and expressing an interest to the manager, only to go two weeks without work before my original manager started giving me shifts again (legend thanks).
Here's the thing, my boss, who exists with three layers of management between myself and him, who I should not be interacting with at all imo, is a begrudging boomer. I'm a non passing trans woman, I don't force the issue at work, I wear a black tshirt and jeans, I get misgendered all day, I go home, I need the money (the people I work with are lovely to their credit). After I'd been working there for a couple of months, bossman and I finally meet, and he starts telling the manager I'm not good with customers, he doesn't want me working front of house stuff (sorry this is kitchen lingo, I did ten years in a kitchen). My manager is confused, so am I but fine whatever BossBaby is obviously going to get what he wants. Manager and I talk, I agree to be trained to work packing orders out the back. I do one shift (at the store close to my house where the role is), and stop getting shifts again (the middle management is changing, we're in the pandemic, people are sick, its all a little up in the air), my old manager gives me some shifts at the first store.
after a month or two bigbabyboss comes in with his wife and kids taking whatever they want from the store, coughing all over the place, questioning why we're wearing masks. He sees I'm there and chews the manager out in the office about him not wanting me talking to customers. The manager (bless them) tells the owner he's clearly got it out for me because he's transphobic (I cringe writing this, this baby's gotta pay rent, it's an insecure role, dont make waves). I'm being rostered in the back of house role again. no more Saturdays, no more after five pm hours. its longer shifts less frequently for lower pay.
fuck
so here I am at three am, unable to sleep, work starts in six hours. I got to sleep at seven am last night, crying my eyes out (remember the insomnia I mentioned when I got the job? no work today at least). I'm borrowing money from my partner for rent again this month, I'm thinking about skipping medication to extend it a bit, since my antidepressants are $50 a month.
I'll try speaking to someone in the Union I'm in but the whole company aside from management is casual, ununionised, and hesitant to do much to change the situation. I could look into moving but my partner works from home as a massage therapist and this place is PERFECT for them so it's not really an option.
I dunno, I'm just venting I guess. this sucks. today is going to suck.