I'm not sure when it happened… but one day I had an existential crisis and realized, that quite literally nothing matters. I mean yeah sure I guess there's a “legacy” you leave behind that would be eventually forgotten not only that but you'd be dead, why would you care about what you leave behind or how you're seen? I've recently become the type that just flows with everything and takes action as situations come along, I simply exist. I can't figure out what to do with my life… I'm 21, and one would say I have a lot going for me but what I want isn't what everyone else wants for me. I simply want to live in peace… I don't want to be a slave to the government. I don't want to waste THIS life climbing an imaginary ladder that at the end of the day doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Nothing phases me anymore, I feel somewhat numb and desensitized caused of my own thoughts. I dream of traveling, writing, painting, trying different foods, meeting different people, and experiencing different cultures… and that's really it. I don't want to get a degree then a 9am-5pm job. That's what everyone is telling me to do with my life, I'm back in school right now… writing this instead of turning in my assignments because I find my classes pointless and don't care about the money I'm wasting. Idk.