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Antiwork

I hate the word “professional.”

Last summer, I was summoned to an HR trial after 38 years with the company for having the nerve to make my manager look like an idiot to his bosses by simply pointing out to his bosses what he did. As the trial progressed, I aborted his prosecution of my offenses by yelling, “Fuck you, Paul!” Aaand, this dullard who was in diapers when I started working there, suddenly turned into Toby from HR. “Hey, now. That's not how 'professionals' talk. Let's keep this 'professional'. We're all 'professionals' here.” Fuck your professional talk. Fuck that word. “Professional” to HR means “accept the unacceptable shit we do to you with a smile on your face.” Fuck professional. If you ever hear a manager start a conversation with “That's not professional,” watch out for your cornhole, Bud. In case you're curious, I quit in disgust the following Monday and had better work…


Last summer, I was summoned to an HR trial after 38 years with the company for having the nerve to make my manager look like an idiot to his bosses by simply pointing out to his bosses what he did. As the trial progressed, I aborted his prosecution of my offenses by yelling, “Fuck you, Paul!”

Aaand, this dullard who was in diapers when I started working there, suddenly turned into Toby from HR. “Hey, now. That's not how 'professionals' talk. Let's keep this 'professional'. We're all 'professionals' here.”

Fuck your professional talk. Fuck that word. “Professional” to HR means “accept the unacceptable shit we do to you with a smile on your face.” Fuck professional.

If you ever hear a manager start a conversation with “That's not professional,” watch out for your cornhole, Bud.

In case you're curious, I quit in disgust the following Monday and had better work within weeks.

Fuck “professional.”

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