The hell I just escaped is basically a version of “out of the frying pan into the fire.” I thought I was leaving hell, not knowing I was going deeper. A friend brought me on as returning a favor that I did for her (I helped her with a career change, then I kept complaining that I needed an out from my previous job, she asked if I was interested in working with her). It was fine at first, kinda fun. When my trainer put in their two weeks, The Boss went ballistic. She was screaming and yelling over the phone (because she's also an absent boss) and told my trainer to just leave. Afterwards, Boss made crazy accusations about my trainer, such as stealing office supplies and “stealing time.” This is just the surface of the huge iceberg that was yet to come.
I noticed other things about Boss over time. She always competes with every woman she sees. She competed with her stepkids when shopping, competed with my friend with height (boss wore high heels every day whenever she came in, friend is over 6ft tall but boss in heels is max 5ft6in). She competed with another employee by doing her hair every morning (idk, I remember when that employee left Boss slicked her hair into ponytails or just left it messy vs before when it was perfectly cut and curled by a professional hairstylist). She competed with another employee on how early she woke up and meditated. She competed with me in knowledge (after trainer left, I would train new employees but Boss would step in and give her two cents/talk over me even though it was very clear that I knew much more than she did). The reason why? Not sure but most of my coworkers agreed that it was insecurity. She always had to be “better” than another woman but always touted that she was “such a feminist” and believed in being a “boss bitch” and taking over the industry as a powerful woman and uplifting other women too. Uhhh, sure Jan.
The next event was when she physically assaulted my friend, the one who brought me into the company. There was no reason except to show off that she could do whatever she wanted and that she was The Boss, the person who was the Alpha and that she isn't intimated by some tall girl. After that happened, my friend left and. After her leaving, Boss claimed that my friend was scared of her screaming for her to get off yet also simultaneously saying that friend put hands on her too. My friend, as previously stated, is over 6ft tall. This woman is BUILT, and one swipe from her would put anyone on the floor. The boss also accused her of breaking equipment that was already broken (any of you see a pattern?). This was when I started frantically looking for a job elsewhere.
But the Boss was not done with being the Alpha Female (it sounds so cringe but that was her basic vibe, being a woman's version of the “alpha male”). Her next target…me. (Sidenote, there were other targets but they were men so she would get on their cases for a day or two and then leave them alone for two weeks, unlike the women who she just kept hounding after. No idea why, you guys can psychoanalyze her yourselves.) I could not do certain things, say certain things, she cut off my connections to other employees and even other companies. I was managing the whole company which had two vastly different departments, and she cut off my access to even step into one specific department. I was banned from managing supplies because I had the audacity to try to order a very basic supply (for the vagueness of where I worked before, let's just say printing paper because it was that basic yet very necessary). She was on my case 24/7 and tried to get other workers to join in on the humiliation (sidenote: I can't be humiliated because I can only humiliate myself and no one else was on her side, except for The Snitch but that's a different story). It was stomach turning to wake up every day and wonder if She would show up. The atmosphere was tense even though everyone else had my back. One employee said that if Boss put a hand on me, she'd (gently and delicately) rip off her weave and go to town.
And one day, I got a call. The most wonderful call ever. I shed tears of joy right after that call and every day after that until the day before I handed in my resignation. The day of that resignation, I was terrified. I thought that she would come from whatever “upscale” service she visited to the office and put my ass into a hospital. When I told others that I was leaving, they were overjoyed for me. The other department (the one I was not allowed to step foot in) was slightly devastated because I was quite literally their only lifeline and manager. Boss was enraged but never came to see me. That night of my resignation, I took most of my belongings with me. Boss went through my desk and maturely decided to destroy whatever I left behind and told me not to come back, even though I had important work to finish and no one else knew how to do it. Old coworkers told me that she yelled some accusations afterwards (Anyone wanna guess? If you answered it was accusations of me stealing and breaking things, you'd be correct. Imaginary point for you!). For those of you wondering how Boss can get away with all of this, it's because she's the co-owner! There is no HR.
I thought I was free, and I am. The job that I'm in now no longer gives me mini anxiety attacks, people here actually don't mind working at this place. I know the variety of antiwork sentiments, and I just want to say that I personally like working and my hell actually had a positive outcome of production; my work/output was important for my community. My work is still important for me, my community, and my productivity. But, I am still stuck with that trauma. The sound of heels clacking still gives me the shakes, and I can't watch some tv shows because the characters are too much like Boss to the point where it ruins everything (dammit I really liked watching Rachel Bloom sing). And I will still struggle with breaking free but hopefully putting this out there can help. Hopefully, The Snitch doesn't report this to Boss; I know he uses Reddit but I don't know if he goes into this sub.