It's like the title says. We were at a small work event to celebrate a milestone, five people max; and somehow the conversation turned towards pronouns and queer folk. I am not trans but I have friends and family that are and I myself am pansexual so I felt comfortable explaining very gently why the office is implementing using them more. I've had this discussion with them before and while they did not understand it I thought they came from a place of love and trying to understand.
A few glasses of wine in and i deeply wonder if that was ever the case. For an hour they spent the time yelling at me about respecting their father about not understanding these things and if he was here he would crack me in the mouth “as he should”. No matter what anyone else at the dinner said they just kept honing in on me despite me still trying to come from a place of understanding, never raising my voice, and not even saying they were wrong.
I have never felt so low thanks to a job. I genuinely love my company but this experience has made me afraid to go back to work. This person famously holds grudges and retaliates against people and I fear for whatever they have in store for me when I return to work. Not to mention the fact that someone who getting promoted in the job said I deserved violence for being part of this community. I tried so much to give them a chance to meet me in the middle, to explain I didn't think them a hateful person, and all that happened was that I left feeling utterly unsafe in my work environment. I don't know what to do or who to even go to about this. Do I just pretend it never happened? Will this coworker even play nice with me at the job going forward? Do I feel safe returning to work with them? I just feel so lost all I've done is cry for the past two hours, what should I do?