I've been really struggling at work. I'm a part time 2nd shift janitor at an elementary school. It's summer break right now so we're deep cleaning. We got all of the classrooms deep cleaned other than the basement but they've told us to not do those right now. Well, I have no idea what to do. There's no physical list of task. My boss doesn't work with us (I work through a 3rd party company and my boss works at another building) so i can't ask for directions. I end up just standing around, aimless and scraping my brain for something to do. I feel awful because I don't like wasting time. Ik I'm supposed to pick up garbage outside so I've been doing that but when it gets too dark, I'm inside for an hour, hour and a half. I texted my boss asking for a list because I have a god awful memory and could not for the life of me remember what she had told me over the phone. It's so frustrating. I don't want to lose my job over this. This whole situation of spinning my wheels really highlights how I struggle with self direction. And like, it's pointless to wipe down the bathrooms because they have a machine that sprays soap and water on everything that cleans the walls, toilets, etc. And like, that's the only thing I can think of. Maybe scrubbing the staircases? But I don't know if there are more important tasks to do.
On top of that, my coworker (we'll call him Nelson, fake name) put his 2 weeks in last Monday so this next Friday is his last day. That wouldn't be a problem if I had another coworker. When I was hired last October there were 3 of us cleaning the 3 level building (a basement and 2 floors). A few months ago, the supervisor of the building left. They haven't found a replacement for her so it's just been me and Nelson cleaning this building. Occasionally they'll have subs who come in and clean the 1st coworkers stuff before they leave to clean other buildings. And when the first coworker left, that meant the supervisor position was available. I tried picking up the tasks for a week and decided I couldn't do it. It took too much of a toll on my mental health. I knew it wouldn't be sustainable long term for me so I told my boss I wasn't interested in the position anymore. That meant Nelson got it. So, if Nelson leaves, that means it falls to me. With Nelson leaving, I will be the only one assigned to my building permanently. I can't clean the whole building myself. I can't seem to self direct. I don't want the extra responsibility. I don't want any of it and I've got so much anxiety.
On top of that, I'll be going back to college this fall. This job is like, the perfect job for working with college. It's from 530pm to 930pm (sometimes 10 during the school year) at $14/hour. I don't have to deal with anyone. I mostly work by myself on my floor of the school (og coworker cleaned the basement and Nelson cleaned the upstairs) with headphones in. I listen to music or YouTube videos. It's a good gig and I really don't want to have to find a new job…