I actually didnt realise how ill I was but when suicidal thoughts began to brew more and more I knew I had a problem.
My work was making me absolutely miserable working closes in a kitchen and working until 2am each night.
In the UK if we quit we receive no unemployment for 3 months as a punishment so I felt trapped. Luckily I visited my doctor and he told me to stop working, he wrote me a sick note, and that allowed me to recieve a basic amount of money each week to get by on.
The first three weeks nothing improved and I was still suicidal. After around 4 weeks I became more proactive and began going for daily walks and seeing my friends.
Within another month of just living and focussing on my health I lost my suicidal thoughts and over the last few weeks I am enjoying life again!
I dont want to go back to my job so now I am looking for new work and considering re-training too, but now I at least have some ambition back.
Long story made short – A lot of the time are depression is a logical response to a miserable existence.
(I also appreciate that I am lucky to at least live in a country that pays people a little money when they are sick. I know its tougher for people outside of western countries).