I had a three month review today. The funny thing is, my performance was good. I know it was good. I learned quickly and I know I was making a big difference to the workload of the others and was helping them catch up on things they had been behind on for a while.
My manager had the things she wanted to mention on a tiny sticky note. The first was that last week, she said the other two ladies were leaving early due to the storm but I had to stay since I lived in town. Was I miffed inside? Sure, but I never showed it or said a word and thought it was a one off.
But today, she brings that up…and she says she made an agreement with them that they can leave early sometimes since they live far. In my interview she mentioned she was glad I lived close. I thought that was a reliability thing but now I see what I was meant for.
We also have summer hours on Friday where we take a shorter lunch and leave earlier. I thought that was just a perk, and a nice one at that. But today she acted like she was being so kind by allowing me to participate in the summer hours. Even though the email was to all of us and never specified only certain people.
One was that she saw me on my phone on Friday. I decided to go on my phone because straight up, I thought I deserved it. I had been working my ass off while they gossip, whisper and go on their own phones. I got back from my lunch on time, we all left at the same time, and they kept eating for another ten minutes. So I was on my phone. My coworkers are always always always on their phones, and it's not work related. I SEE them on Facebook. My one coworker is physically on her phone to her husband half the day shooting the shit.
I have no issue with this. I have an issue with being centered out. I get paid essentially minimum wage. They all make tons more than me as they've been there for years.
I understand there is a level of unavoidable favoritism, ,I do. But I'll only put up with so much. You can't pay me way less and then expect ne to follow this strict regime no one else around me has to follow. I brought up the rule should be the same for everyone, she said no it shouldn't. That I'm new. I brought up how sometimes for a new employee we gauge what is okay by what we see others doing. My one coworker sells Monat and sells it to them. Last Friday, they spent quite a bit of time going over what was on sale, looking at it, and talking about what they want to order. Again, I have no issue with this. But when my manager brought up the phone last Friday and said I should always be busy, I put down my phone and asked her what she would like me to work on. She showed me, and I did it. To me, this was showing I acknowledged she was not happy and I took note to rectify it right away. That's why I don't get why one time I was on my phone got brought up again today.
Anyways, I was so professional and well spoken throughout this whole conversation. She is a very argumentative lady and there comes a point where it's not a conversation anymore. I picked this up about her early on which is why I contemplated saying anything at all but I rolled the dice. I kindly brought up that it was confusing to have such strict behaviour expected of me when I hear people around me online shopping and whatnot and that it really wasn't fair. She lost it when I said this. I worded it nicely and again I kept saying I wasn't trying to attack anyone or insult anyone, I just wanted to reach an understanding as I know they also wanted to hire new people and this may confuse them as well. She started yelling in a really high pitched voice about how my coworker sells Monat and they support her and how it was only for two minutes and how dare I bring that up and it's none of my buisness. I told her I didn't mean to upset her and felt she was taking me the wrong way and I wasn't attacking her. She then kicked me out of her office and then said “You know what you need to do? Keep your eyes on the screen and focus on what you're doing and that's it. Don't distract yourself with things that aren't your concern” so I took her advice and never went back, since coddling her two star employees by making me a workhorse isn't my concern.
After about 30 minutes past when I was due back I had a missed call from her.
I'll delete this soon just needed to vent. This is how I try to make it better for the next victim- hopefully boundaries won't be such a surprise next time. But knowing managers like this, they will be.