I work at a box factory. I don't have a car, and it's in walking distance. I was at first hired to do some basic monkey work- cutting large blocks of foam into smaller blocks. But the company ended up moving all the non-woodworking departments to a different city. Obviously, I couldn't make the switch. But they offered me a new position and a 1$ pay raise. (That I only got about 3 months in but its retroactive so fine) I do cleaning now, basically I throw away trash and clean toilets, and basic yard work, weed wacking and mowing.
Been there for a year and about 5 months now, been the cleaner for around 4 months.
I hate it.
I listen to a lot of YouTube while working. It's the only thing I really love about my job. But listening to these people make a living talking about the things I love, the things I'm passionate about, it just crushes me sometimes. I desperately want to feel fulfilled by my work. But it's soul draining. If you went back in time and asked my 18 year old self what the worst possible job I could have is, “cleaning toilets at the box factory” might actually be the answer. It's almost hilarious.
There are other factors, the culture there is very against my lifestyle and personal beliefs, and there have been some personal issues that cropped up, but that hasn't really bothered me until recently. Something happened that broke my spirit entirely. It was honestly a simple thing, but quite embarrassing. No one there judges me for it, at least not publicly and to my face, but I can't stand to even be there anymore. Combined with my already increasing sense of resentment for myself it's just too much. I can't do it anymore. I asked for changes to be made and there was no budge. As such I'm planning to reiterate them and I am prepared to be terminated and regardless I will be putting in my two weeks.
Issue is, I feel like I am making a mistake. I make OK money. I work the hours I want. The physical labor sucks but could be much worse. And being able to listen to youtube at work is great. All things considered it's the best job I've had so far. My girlfriend has offered to help support me while I get my license, I should be able to get a vehicle for free from my family, but money is tight and I would have to make some serious changes to my lifestyle if I won't be earing income for the foreseeable future. But my heart tells me to get the fuck out of this place and chase a stupid dream.
Am I making mistake?