My current job, and thinking about finding a future job, make me wanna kill myself.
I hate corp speak, I hate having to lie so I can be hired, to pretend to be happy so I can fit in, and to get shit thrown at me just because people in power can. I hate this whole culture. I hate that I am a depressed, talentless, pushover, who just isn't meant to survive in this meat grinder.
What's the point in living a life that will just get worse? No connection to people, No love for myself. No hope in sight. All this and I won't even afford my own home, ever.
It's like I'm playing one of those pay-to-win games and I can't pay.
I just want to be dead. My own friends don't like me anymore, because I became a constant downer.
I honestly don't know how I'll make it to next week let alone a month or more.
How do you guys deal with the knowledge that there is no escaping this part of life?
( I am in therapy and drink happy pills. No psychiatrist can fix a shitty life, even if they mean well)