I hate my job. I'm the oldest member in the team. I don't know how I've been able to stay so long but I just can't do it anymore.
I've been applying for other jobs but have only gotten refused or ghosted completely. I'm obviously not good at what I do. I'm not an “a-player” or whatever the fuck that new catchy phrase is to describe and glorify a workaholic so I won' t find a new job easily.
I can' t just quit because of course, I can't risk losing everything. So I compromise my mental health just to pay the god bills.
I don't know what the point of this post was. A cry for help or just to vent. I don't know. I feel so desperate.