Hey Antiwork world. I am having a bit of an emotional rollercoaster after being escorted out of my office when I put my two weeks notice in. If you would indulge me, I am genuinely interested in knowing if what I did was wrong in any way. I will be as honest as I can as details are already starting to fade.
I have worked for the same company for 13 years. I started before I graduated from tech school and I became the single source for all things computer. I worked very hard (I think) completed many projects and really uplifted the company to have a better technological foot print all while making sure our systems were compliant to government regulations. In spring 2020, one of my children had to be placed in residential treatment for mental health issues. The company was super cool and flexible with me having to leave and go to visit as the hours were restricted from Covid. It was a 2 1/2 hour drive and I would go in the mornings, leave to get to the facility by 1pm, see my kid for an hour, drive home and work remotely to make up my time. I believe I was consistent with making up my time but I am sure there was some slippage but being a salaried employee on call 24×7, I didn’t think it was an issue. My child came home fall of 2021 and things resumed to a more consistent schedule and anytime I’d miss during the week, I’d make up or use pto. I have always been underpaid in this company. I usually had to bitch or once threaten to leave to get any sort of raise. This past May, I approached my boss with salary surveys and job listing in our area that were paying substantially more. I asked that these numbers would be considered is all. No threats, and the only unpleasant part of the conversation is my bosses comment that “we can’t pay you this, you be making as much as management” which I thought was a really weird thing to say. Like sorry the market says I’m worth more? I got my raise and it was 3%. That raise didn’t put me anywhere near even the low end of my market value. I was also told I would not be getting the funds I needed for consulting for a major project, a rockstar subordinate quit because they wouldn’t give him the raise that I recommended he get, and some very good opportunities passed by because i didn’t go after them.
I spoke to a recruiter and they landed me a gig with better benefits and a 45k raise. How can I say no to that? Totally remote as well. After much soul searching or whatever it is called, I took the job.
Today, I put in my two weeks notice and my boss flipped out. This is a guy who I have gotten along with for many years and he always seemed to have my back. He was very supportive during my issues with my child and I was planning on telling him how grateful I was to him for being a decent boss. I didn’t get the chance to say it. He told me this was bullshit and I was betraying him after he was there for me in my darkest hour. He slid my resignation letter back to me and told me to keep it. I then said we should go have this conversation with hr and he very much agreed. Hr wasn’t available so we went back our respective offices and I emailed hr cc’ my boss that I wanted an appointment to discuss my resignation. I went back to work and missed a call from hr but shortly went down to their office. I handed hr my resignation letter and that any conversations with my boss needed to be in HR’s presence which they agreed to. I explained my last day would be September 2nd and asked some questions about leftover pto etc. went back to my desk and my boss accidentally sent me a text message that he meant to send to a colleague to lock me out of everything as I was a security risk. I responded to the text that I understood and I will pack my things and turn in my keys. I grabbed my bag and went to HR and my boss was in there with the hr manager. I let him know I got his text and here is my keys and my badge. I showed the text to hr and I asked how do we do this and they said my pto would be my last two weeks. My boss then started saying things like “you’ve betrayed me” and “I wasted so much effort on you”. My response was I’m really sorry you feel that your time with me was a waste. He then started to scold me on all the damage I was leaving behind. I then said I was perfectly willing to work the two weeks and get things ready for my replacement. We obviously didn’t get to this point but I was going to also tell him I’d work part time evenings and weekends on some major projects to help soften the blow. I’d make some money and they wouldn’t be stalled I thought it be a win for both of us. I said you are taking this really personal. He then yelled you bet I am. I then said this is absolutely egregious and walked away. Hr escorted me to my office so I could get some things. I told my HR manager that he is a fucking lunatic and I loved working here. We hugged and I left.
Sorry for the long read but I want to be truthful. My entire career at this place was marked with constant praise, near perfect reviews, and very few issues on my part that I am aware of. I worked overtime when it was needed. I put up with the low salary because I was grateful for my job, the people I worked with, and the flexibility that I thought was awarded because of my performance. Im sitting at home right now wondering what Im going to do and if did something wrong. I feel terribly guilty but I believe more than ever this was the right decision for me and my family.
Did I do anything wrong?
Did I betray my boss?
Should I have stayed longer in appreciation during a really rough time in my life?
Any constructive feedback would be appreciated.