okay so i’m in college right now, but i’m unemployed and i’d really like to start paying back my loans while i’m in school so the interest doesn’t build up too much. except i’m hideously mentally ill, even with meds, and i genuinely can’t tolerate work. like… it just makes me shut down. it’s like i go into autopilot. even when i get home, it’s like i’ve been disconnected. im assuming it’s related to my anxiety but i can’t be sure.
i tried to apply for disability benefits because i have quite a few disorders and the like, but, get this: i can’t get disability (aka money for being unable to work) because i haven’t worked enough to qualify for it.
and i just… how the hell am i supposed to work more if i can’t work? how do i make money? i tried looking for at home jobs but my anxiety is so severe that i can’t tolerate phone calls (i can’t even call family most of the time). why is this the life i have to live?