On Friday, a coworker (who has in the past mentioned how she was up until midnight working on a project) sent me a chat message at 2pm asking if she could call me. I let her know I was in a meeting, and I wasn't able to get back to her until 4. She asked, “Is 5:30 too late?” and I replied “My day ends at 5.” She said she'd schedule something for Monday – but at 4:53 said “Can I call you to explain what I'm looking for?” I knew such a call wouldn't be over by 5, so I didn't reply.
I felt twinges of guilt – she's a nice person who either through conditioning or tyrannical management apparently feels she needs to grind on past working hours. But in the end I work to live rather than living to work, and I can't let those who think differently drag me into their dysfunction.