unfortunately, i can see where this is going. i've been around long enough to have seen it happen to several other people employed with you.
last summer, i used to feel so happy coming in to work. so motivated to do my best. so much so, that it quickly became a PERSONAL GOAL for me do my part in helping you succeed; and i did my damnedest to hit that goal every day i walked in.
well, i'll tell ya, picking up doubles every time someone calls out (sadly, this happened more often than not) and working 13 days in a row, that'll really begin to wear on you. i tried to thug it out, but the truth is; i'm not ashamed to admit- i am not built like that. not for somebody else's dime.
dude, i started to wake up feeling like i hadn't even slept the night before… so exhausted i actually collapsed in the hallway the morning i decided to put myself first. i had a damn near perfect attendance before i learned that i could set the bar up so well all i had to do was turn on lights and set out mats the next morning. why the schedule required my presence two long hours before open, i don't know. but i deemed myself unnecessary that early. lord knows it wouldn't have happened had i put matters into your hands instead of my own.
part from a hefty $2 raise; i never saw any compensation or even a “thanks for what you're doing. i appreciate you.” some sort of human recognition.
which is precisely what motivates me.
money is trivial, made-up, a shared fiction. therefore that's not what gets me going. & that's why i didn't ever ask for more, why i was SO appreciative of the raise i did receive.
still, after:
stepping up to do all our dishes (while on a serving shift)
or quickly learning how to prep
or bussing for everyone
random stuff that has nothing to do with servers
or shit, even managing for a scrape of time with absolutely no preparation whatsoever.
you never once let me know that you saw me. that you were grateful.
so the decision i made was easy. & the day my exhaustion made itself prominent; was the day i stopped doing the most for the absolute least.
my 150% turned to 80%
then i got to santa fe and realized i wasn't the only employee treated in such a manner…
my 80% turned to 60%. (if that.)
i'm aware i can keep doing what i'm doing and give less and less and still be successful. doing only what i need to for my tables and my team.
that's petty. and i can't keep doing that because it's depressing me. i am not giving my all into everything i do. i don't want to! not anymore. i loved working there. the people and that atmosphere was unlike any other i've ever experienced while at WORK. i meant what i said when i told you; you did that. you created this.
it's extraordinary.
which is why it hurts me to see how terribly you waste the potential that walk into those doors every now and again. it also hurts to know i'm part of that. not perceivably worth keeping around for long. despite the indifference. despite the effort. despite the loyalty.
you can't still be wondering why so many many great people/employees are no longer employed by you. e.g, ryan spencer? zoltan? x? maybe even pete? and that's not to mention the people from nebraska; that were absolutely driven into the dirt. truly working everyday, twice a day, by himself with no end in sight.
i wish you honest luck with your new hires. i hope you quickly learn that keeping your current people, (that have given you countless hours of service) happy and fed, keeping their cups FULL, is moreso the key to the solutions of your current struggles.
after all, a cornerstone of the success of a restaurant is consistency. & with an astonishing turn-over rate, consistency begins to decline bc of the time wasted training new people that will likely never return to work for you. a successful business is built upon employees who care. i'll ask you, how much can someone possibly care if they are an underpaid temp? and yet, you put these fresh people (that you don't even know) ahead of your faithful/returning employees.
anyway. all i'm saying is,
i'm tired of being a flower that's trying to grow in concrete, constantly spewed with some shitty, off brand round-up.
but i do thank you for the experience <3