Hi all, big fan of what is going on here and find myself far more comfortable championing others and not myself. I wanted to share my current situation to try and get some perspective, and advice. (I am located in the United Kingdom)
So I am in a WFH job and without sharing too much it is not something that really holds much value (in my opinion) and is a company that manages workers. My own views right from the start made it a bit of a tough pill to swallow, and I hate working with clients who actively try to find ways to pay their employees less, avoiding sick pay and holiday pay etc. From the start my boss made comments on my physical appearance but I put it to one side in an effort to see the person I suppose, despite my discomfort. (I have an ongoing issue believing that I am always at fault, and I recently have been working with a brilliant therapist who is helping me see its not the case)
Worth noting I have a lot (A LOT) of responsibility at work and manage clients alone, globally, and am a major part in many of the companies successes. I make £27k.
I want to just itemise the things going on below:
- Working hours set to 37.5 however our contract automatically opts us out of the working time directive and as such they request us at anytime to work more than 48 hours a week with no overtime pay. If we are not online they will message us via whatsapp or video call.
- Three months notice period from employees to the employer in all levels in the business. One week notice from the employer to the employee in event of termination.
- Culture of overwork, burnout and working whilst ill. They regularly praise employees who work 14 hour days and who work whilst sick on company wide emails.
- Abusive clients, screaming and expletive emails. Lots of foot stomping and barraging and no measures in place to protect employees. We are told that no matter where we work this will be the case and there is no point complaining. “The clients are paying us so we do what they tell us, even if they are wrong.”
- I have many times explained that I am at a breaking point, have broken down and attempted to advocate for myself. Have been called a snowflake and that I need to get used to this. When I say that I am at my max and have so much on my plate I am struggling to juggle everything, they give me more work and more projects. “If you are kept busy you will have no time to be upset and work yourself up”
- I have tried to hand in my notice many times. I have felt extremely guilty about this and have been again told “no matter where you work it is always the same, you wont get a better job than this”. It has now gotten to a point I feel totally impotent and cry every time I try to hand my notice in, and am letting myself be talked back into staying as I feel I have no energy.
I want to finish this off with a note because I think this is partly my issue as I don't really care about my job at all. I have not come from a very privileged background and I have been working to support myself since I was a teenager, and have not been able to go to further education. I have a lot of passions and I believe I have talent in the things I love to do, but out of fear I have not dedicated myself to really trying to make these goals come true. I have done well in my “career” but I don't want it. I don't want to move from this job to the next and it just be the same… I want to be brave. I really, desperately don't want to keep going like this. Like many, many of us here, I can't imagine how I can keep going my whole life like this (I wont be able to retire). SO many people in my life tell me that this is just reality, this is how it will always be so I need to suck it up and get over myself.
Am I in the wrong? Is this not bad and I am just weak? I want to be right, but I don't believe in myself.