I've had a slew of jobs in my life so far but none have stuck. When I'm at work, I do my job very efficiently. I enjoy socializing with the customers, making them smile. Letting them talk about themselves. However while at home, some days I just fight myself internally to get up and go. I feel lazy. I feel- selfish? Guilty. Disappointed. I've called into work one day for the past 3 weeks.
Today was one of those days and I'm thinking soon I will be getting a talking to from my boss. On top of it all I'm constantly exhausted and fall asleep often during the day when I'm not working. When I wake up to get ready for a shift I feel exhausted and groggy. Some days I can shake it, others I'm too worried to even drive.
I am desperate for the money, I support myself and live alone. Why can't I just work like everyone else? Why can't I just be dependable/reliable? Why is it so hard to keep my mind on track? Why does my motivation just not want to cooperate? Has anyone else experienced this? Or have any advice?