Hi /r/antiwork. I'm a middle manager with 13 years of experience: 8 being middle managed, and 5 managing lowers. I've been reading a lot in this sub trying to learn how to be a better boss, and I can't say I've learned as much as I have from self-help books with titles like “Success in the Workplace” written by other middle managers, but I have learned some stuff. So thanks.
I have a “small p” problem with what a lot of you are saying, though. (See, I learned that in “Success in the Workplace 2”; soften someone's mistake by saying it's a small p problem, not a big P Problem.) No one wants to come back to the office, but the excuses I hear leave out a crucial element. Yeah, I know you can hear and see the same over video chat as you would in person, but you're missing the importance of two other senses that can only be experienced in person: smell and touch. We'll ignore touch for now, because I also learned in another book that touching at work is inappropriate.
Did you know odors are closely tethered to memories? You're more likely to remember a colleague's name or bright ideas if you realize he wears Old Spice, just like your stepdad did before he went to jail for armed robbery.
Smells can also be super motivating. Maybe you don't drink coffee, but you can get a noncontact high from the patinaed Keurig roasting coffee three cubicles over.
And don't forget the office bathroom. I can't tell you how vital the bathroom has been to my career. Chats at the urinal or sink with upper management, whom I never seemed to be able to corner in other settings, were essential to my getting ahead. The aroma and sounds of that setting, including Ron in sales who apparently only juices or drinks beer, seem to breed camaraderie just as fast as they seem to breed bacteria.
So, what I'm saying is: Stop to smell the roses, /r/antiwork. The roses that your building manager overpaid landscapers for, mere steps away from your cubicle. Come back. We miss you.
/s