Tl;dr it’s project crunch time, senior team member tells my wife she can’t be a mom this week because the project absolutely needs to be delivered.
This story took place a while ago. My wife was working on a massive project for her company’s largest client. Seven figures of new revenue, huge reputation boost for the company. This was a big project, one that would propel anyone’s career forward (or potentially sink your career if the project goes badly). The stakes were high.
My wife (along with others on the project team) has been busting her ass for months working on this project. About 2-3 weeks before the deadline they realized that there’s a very real possibility they will miss the deadline. Missing the deadline was not an option as it would have huge cascading effects. Needless to say, everyone on the project team was extremely tense and stressed out. As mentioned, my wife has been working hard for months, but especially so in the month leading up to the deadline. To the point where the kids and I barely saw her that month. My wife felt like an awful mother and wife, but I kept reassuring her it’s temporary and it could have huge long term benefits for her career and in turn a better lifestyle for our family.
The week right before the deadline the most senior project team member, a person who my wife deeply respected, worked with every day, had a fantastic working relationship with, casually tells my wife “you’re not allowed to be a mom next week. The office is open if you want a distraction free environment, we’ll even expense your gas mileage” (since work from home is still the official work model).
Total slap in the face to my wife. She was absolutely floored someone said this to her because she’s already been giving 100% and I’ve been making sure the kids and I let her work in peace. Just goes to show how many sacrifices people put in go completely unnoticed and unappreciated.
The project went well. My wife is still with the company as she does genuinely enjoy the job most days, though she is absolutely expecting a promotion later this year. She made it clear to her boss and the other senior project member that
she is not accepting anything less than a promotion and raise this year. For years she hasn’t been given promotions that we’re rightfully deserved, but if she doesn’t get promoted this year I suspect this will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. The labour market is tight, her skills are in demand and there are other employers that will give her what she deserves.