So for context, I've been working since I was 17 and every job I've had has never officially fired me for any real reason.
But these jobs would cut my hours or not be honest about my performance. Sometimes they don't even give me clear ways to improve it. Thus they cut hours and leave me for dead it feels like.
Fast forward to this month, I find an employer who is mostly honest about how much he pays me and he basically talks about capitalism all the time and the reason these jobs don't just fire you.
In short, they don't want to pay for your unemployment. So they rather make you quit instead. Because they don't see you as a valuable employee anymore or at all.
From all the jobs I had, it all started to make sense now. All the lies and excuses these jobs told me we're just that. And I'm sitting trying to figure out why this is a pattern.
He told me all of this last night and I got slightly depressed and anxious that I got high from my bosses weed and I started to have weird sensation all over my body. It was a terrible and scary high and I regret it.
Also my new boss is a 110 percent workaholic and I don't care that he is, I'm just not lol I would love to bring more value to his business because I believe in it but…
…I'm starting to realize and really understand how people can get so tired of working there ass off and it not get appreciated because of greed, favoritism, and just over all burnout to be the most valuable.
So now I'm just laying here trying to figure out how to live in a world like this. Bc the world for the most part cares more about value to a company than the individual person. It's kind of a scary prospect.
Does anyone have any suggestions to over come this?
TL;DR: quit a bunch of jobs, that all screwed me over, recent boss tells the truth and I get really depressed and fucked up from weed, I feel like capitalism is holding us back…