I want to share what happen to me this week since it was a little bit traumatizing. After an interview, where I don't hide the fact that yes, I have lot of different experiences with kids, but no real formation, I spend 3 hours as an observer in the nursery. After the 3 hours, I'm still honest, and I admit that I'm not feeling ready to take care of 8 kids by myself. Not only it's a lot of responsibility, but I'm a bit of an anxious person and it's just too much noise and people for me. The director insist that I can do it, that she believe in me and that I'm anxious because it's a new job, but it will pass. Monday, I haven't receive any training from them, I don't know the kid's names, they didn't told me that I had to prepare an activity, I don't know the plan of the day, etc. Plus, when the kids arrive, it's just more kids, noise, and stress for me because the two class are together before they get in each other room. After two hour of this, I ask another adult to take care of the kids while I go to the bathroom. Once in the bathroom, I just start crying. When I get out, the woman is still taking care of the kids and don't paid attention to me. I didn't know what to do, I panicked and I just left. I felt bad for them because I broke their plans, but I didn't feel respected. I was honest about the stress I was going through after the first day, and they still let me alone with kids without any help or training. Not only I wasn't respected, but it was a little bit irresponsible from them. It's been two day and I haven't receive any news from the director. I feel like I should call or write to her to say sorry, but I also don't really want. What do you think? Am I overreacting? Should I write?
Ps. English is not my first language. Sorry for the mistake.