Hey all. I’m finally leaving my shitty job at a small business, but my former boss seems to have it out for me. She was contacted by a job I applied to and asked for a reference, which she completely tanked by saying I was hired under x condition and didn’t complete it.
(Very) long story short, my ex-boss is a narcissist. For the last 6 months, she has been hyping me up to others and tearing me down to my face, she gaslit me on the regular, and she refused to send me anything in writing (presumably to keep the gaslighting). I shouldn’t have allowed this new job to contact my old one, but I was afraid it would look bad if I didn’t wow them to.
Anyway, my ex-boss did not adhere to the employment offer that I signed, and refused to pay for a certification that she had previously said she would pay for. I then elected to take the whole year I was offered to get this certification instead of the faster-paced 200 days, because I would be paying the $800 all by myself. In the reference, she wrote that I was hired with the agreement that I would get the certification and I did not, therefore she wouldn’t hire me again. 1) I didn’t agree to this (advanced) certification, I said I would be open to looking into the possibility and 2) they agreed to pay for it and then told me that they wouldn’t.
What do I do now? I know she’s tanking this because she is angry at me for leaving. It’s not a factually accurate reference, and I know it’s going to hurt my chances of getting this job. Do I contact the new job and ask to explain the situation? Do I offer replacement references that can testify to my reliability? Ugh. I’m so tired of dealing with this woman. When I asked for advice n how to make an exit plan, she berated me for a half an hour for being “so unprofessional”.
Edit: we have no HR. The admin of this organization was just her and I, with her being the executive director. There are no other employees aside from caregivers.