I only graduated two years ago but during my studies I was so passionate and had high hopes for my future. I wanted to build and invest on myself, network with people, expand my knowledge and just keep learning wherever I go to hopefully eventually utilize this knowledge to help others. I used to constantly read books about my topic of interest, took online courses and did programs…
Then I applied to this high-end job which was the only opening during covid, and I didn’t even think i’d get in but I did. Before I even started, I knew the position was unsuitable for me but unfortunately, the way it works in my country is you basically have no say in where you’re put and the topic you majored in is not taken into account at all.
Its just not the right place for me and my skills – basically they give you work thats way above the capabilities of a new employee and expect you to excel at it.
I’m then constantly being compared to those above me, and watched upon like im in a protection program.
I stay 7 hours, 5 days a week just to feel mind numbingly stupid and constantly questioning myself. My self-confidence is slowly slipping away day by day, and its the worst thing in the world that a job, out of anything, is making me feel these things.
(Side note: I absolutely do not mind leaving except all my non-employed friends are still struggling to find jobs cause for some reason every company decided that they don’t wanna recruit??)