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Antiwork

One day as an office temp.

Decades ago, I had a girlfriend who worked for only one day as an office temp at a hell hole of a company. Her boss “Linda” told her to shred some documents. But Linda was a bit rude. So my girlfriend says okay Linda, I'll get ALL the documents shredded for you. She shredded the documents and then she started shredding all of the other documents in their big file storage room. She spent the day shredding everything. She shredded all of their tax records. She shredded all of their personnel files. She shredded all of their insurance files. She shredded everything she could get her hands on. My girlfriend was quite attractive. So various guys who were working at the facility would find their way over to her area to talk to her. They volunteered to help her shred files. She had several guys helping her load files into…


Decades ago, I had a girlfriend who worked for only one day as an office temp at a hell hole of a company. Her boss “Linda” told her to shred some documents. But Linda was a bit rude. So my girlfriend says okay Linda, I'll get ALL the documents shredded for you. She shredded the documents and then she started shredding all of the other documents in their big file storage room. She spent the day shredding everything. She shredded all of their tax records. She shredded all of their personnel files. She shredded all of their insurance files. She shredded everything she could get her hands on.

My girlfriend was quite attractive. So various guys who were working at the facility would find their way over to her area to talk to her. They volunteered to help her shred files. She had several guys helping her load files into this big giant shredder that kept overheating and jamming. By time the day was over, everything, as in everything, was shredded. File cabinets all emptied and big bags of shredded files taken out to the dumpster.

She then got into the HR computer system and changed the start dates for some of the recent employees so their health insurance would start several weeks early. Also, instead of deleting computer files, she changed various dates and numbers in all kinds of computer documents.

All of this was done on the first and only day on the job as an office temp. There are many more more stories concerning this girlfriend who has now been my closest friend for over 30 years. But most of these extraordinary stories I will never tell. Our shenanigans and experiences would make for one heck of a movie plot, a tragic comedy.

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