This will probably be a bit long, but here goes:
As the title says, I am finally leaving a toxic “work exchange”/barter after nearly three years. I started in August 2020. When I mention work exchange, I mean I worked in exchange for room and board.
To begin, I wasn't exactly looking for a place to stay but saw an ad for a “live-in” role. I was living with extended family (and paying rent to them in a less-than-ideal situation). This live-in role was in a major city nearby I'd wanted to move to for years, so, of course, the role sounded too good to be true (it was). Free room and board in a major city!
At first, I didn't mind the situation because when I moved in, it was during lockdown (I had my own room and bathroom), and liked the idea of a community.
The environment was very laid back, or so I thought, and I didn't really think much about my work schedule, but my opinions changed over time. I soon realized that the bosses (an old married couple) were using the community as a means to exploit labor and run an entire business without properly compensating anyone. This is hidden by the glam of the location and appealing to broke and vulnerable creatives looking to “make it” and work on their own projects without the burden of rent.
During my exchange, I had to work 6 days a week, 4 hours a day (so, 24 hours of work, which I was aware of and agreed to). Didn't mind at first until I realized that the couple liked to do a podcast EVERY Saturday night that we were mandated to be in attendance for… which brings my work total to 27.5 hours. On top of that, the turnover was so high, and when we were short-staffed, we had to work extra hours, bringing the total to over 30 hours a week of unpaid work. Additionally, my bosses always required us to work holidays. Time off was allowed very infrequently and mostly just in the case of family emergencies.
Although this was advertised as an ideal to work on my own stuff, it was clear that the bosses only wanted people to work for them 24/7. They don't care about or encourage outside work, and complained if there were any scheduling conflicts.
And here's more that came up over my time: Almost everyone that left, was fired or quit on bad terms. The zoning is also strange for this building, and when people were fired, instead of being allowed a proper notice to leave, sometimes my bosses would sometimes try to push people out immediately and say, “Well this is a commercial building, so you don't live here,” in order to justify kicking people out and not going through proper tenant laws.
I've seen the male boss snap at numerous people, and scream and call them names when they contest him or fall out of favor with him. To spite people, he threatens to sue and in cases has sued them, and has even called one of my ex-coworker's former work-places when she stood up to him and left on bad terms.
The couple that runs the business has no idea what they're truly doing, especially the man. They always want to hire the best of the best, but end up never listening to them, or we all end up doing stupid vanity projects (they were Z-list media personalities once upon a time and never let that go, apparently) that don't lead to anything. And that's only a small fraction of everything wrong. Additionally, I made a mistake and got somewhat involved with one of my housemates/coworkers. My male boss blamed me for my boyfriend's inability to keep up with his work, and would constantly insinuate that I needed to leave, but since they really needed my boyfriend, who does technical/website work for them, he was needed… so I was allowed to stay even though it was “against the rules.” We were never out in the open, but my boss has security cameras that show when we leave the house, and in places like the kitchen, so he can see us hanging out or making food. And one more thing, the male boss loved to micromanage the kitchen. While food was included in the deal, he was extremely strict on what we could get. Also, he made us all get boxes to put our food in in the fridge… think of little cubbies for our food… and anything that didn't fit into the cubbies wasn't allowed to be in the fridge. And he loved to hover around while we were cooking, so I was afraid to cook.
Why did I stay so long? Once I quit my food service job for this place, it took me a bit to stabilize with my freelance work, and due to COVID and debts, I struggled to save money. Not to mention the scheduling of the place I worked prevented me from getting a full job on the side. I did get a good remote job later so I could store money away to leave. So, for over a year, I have been working 7 days a week to save money to move out. I was afraid to tell my family about what was happening. The good thing (one of the few) was that I had lovely coworkers/housemates that I've grown really close with. They made the work bearable, so the experience wasn't all terrible.
After saving up enough money, and getting everything together, I finally quit. I feel like I will need therapy after all this. I've gained weight due to stress, an irregular schedule, and my skin looks awful. Not to mention, I've developed other health issues from being here due to the insane amount of anxiety I've gone through.
I'm pretty sure a lot of this is illegal, but I don't know what to do. Mostly, I just want to leave and move on.