This entire thread is giving me life. This is a bit long but I need to get it off my chest.
I was recruited to this new company from my old one to build a very difficult and politically sensitive program. I was told from the beginning that there was a good chance that it wouldn't work, so it would not reflect poorly on me if things didn't work out.
I have two bosses, one is amazing and the other was the one who recruited me and was previously a friend and I am absolutely done with her after this.
For this program, after she got into ONE argument with one of the groups involved, completely bailed on the program, leaving me to sort out everything. I was living with my dad during COVID and the only reason I managed to get through all of this was because of him. I would be in tears at the end of every day and he made it a requirement that we would make dinner together and then sit down and discuss what had happened, how the others are viewing/approaching the situation etc. over a couple of glasses of wine.
Any time I reached out to this boss for support it was always “I trust you, I am not needed there.”
Fast forward two years, the program is now a success, I now have people working for me and suddenly apparently all of this is because of her. Any time something doesn't work out it is all “I thought I made my expectations clear to you.” But any time something goes well it's all “this is because of my profile and my relationships and work to date.”
This is someone who is viewed quite publicly as supporting early career folks, particularly women. BULL.
I have been nearing my wit's end. She halted the promotion that my other boss wanted to give me because it was “offensive” that I be considered at this more senior level without a PhD “though I recognize she is doing the job already”.
On the phone with me “you are paid more than enough so there will be no more raises, and 'manager' is a good title for your age anyway.”
This has been infuriating me and I told work that if I need a graduate degree to move up as per their requirements then they need to pay for it. Which they have agreed to, but not part-time off to be able to complete these studies that apparently I need to move up.
Yesterday was the final straw. There is an issue with one of the programs that I have raised for a year that has been ignored. A big meeting is coming up and I received a message to which the entire senior leadership team was copied asking where something was. I said that we don't have it yet, due to some of the COVID pressures, extensions were requested from these vulnerable communities that I obviously granted, and said that we can share the updates later.
“Well [my name], I thought it was clear that my expectations are that these are received by this date, otherwise we aren't doing our jobs sufficiently, but clearly you don't understand that. No worries though, we will fix it 🙂 “
My blood is still boiling, I almost quit right there, and was applying to jobs all last night.
She has NEVER been involved, she has bailed from the FIRST political argument and she has NEVER given any type expectations for anything, I have structured everything and there is LEGITIMATE reason why this was delayed.
I am so absolutely done.