To begin with context, I was a barista/shift lead for 3 years at a cafe. I was/is very passionate about coffee, and for the majority of my time working there, It was my career goal and I put my heart and soul into my work. I felt that this was one of the best places I could be working at. It being a small business, the money wasn't the best, but the friendships I had formed with my coworkers and employers were special to me (at the time). We had achieved a lot together. We had suffered a loss of one of our friends/coworkers together. We all spent time together. We talked about our life goals, our issues, our struggles. My boss felt like a mentor, not just for coffee, but for dealing with day to day life problems, teaching me how to be the best person I can be, in and outside of work. I felt truly appreciated as an employee, and that I had a fantastic support system all around me. But looking back I felt like I was naive to invest so much of myself emotionally into my place of work.
To begin with the title of this post. One shift (Summer 2021) I was working a very busy rush with my coworker. Mask mandates in California were still in affect, and we had a limit to how many people were allowed in the cafe. It was pretty stressful but I was used to this as a team lead. Things went weird however as one gentlemen outside began asking people for a cell phone to borrow. He appeared to be unhoused, and I noticed was making people seem uncomfortable by the look on their faces. He came inside the cafe (unmasked) and aggressively asked to borrow a phone to make a call. I asked him to wait outside for me since he wasn't wearing a mask, and that I would give him the phone once I finish a few drinks I was working on. He initially complied and went outside, but came back in asking even more aggressively that he needs the phone now. But once again, sternly, I told him to wait and that he needs to be outside. I wish I had just given him the phone to get him out of my hair, but I feel that my stress of the busy workday and the mask/person limit made my attitude short and irritable which only fed into escalating the situation. He came back inside even more aggressively and began demanding that he needs a phone. At this point I'm talking back reiterating my request for him to wait outside while growing increasingly frustrated. He then proceeds to take a step behind our counter which is literally and figuratively crossing a boundary I no longer feel safe with. I turn to my coworker and ask to get ready to call the local security. As I turn back around I see a fist coming towards my face, then the sudden stun and shock of impact with the bridge of my nose. I stumble back holding my face which is now bleeding, and I hear the sound of customers gasping at what had just occurred. He leaves the cafe, and people begin calling the police, my coworker checking in on me.
Fast forward the police come. I press no charges as they don't know where the man went off to, and I feel it will be only more of an unnecessary hassle for someone who will most likely never return to the area. Out of concern for everyone in the shop and more importantly my coworker, I reassure everyone that I am okay and that I am still 'here and present'. I don't want anyone to worry. I'm trying to calm myself down, laugh it off, keep doing what I'm doing all while feeling a massive amount of adrenaline coursing through me. I call my boss to inform him of what has occurred. I try to reassure him as well, I tell him I'm okay, I try to joke a bit as well, and ask if he can be here as soon as possible. He shows up an hour or so later. We're both making jokes about it and smiling. Reassuring once again that I'm okay. And I guess thats all he needed to confirm that everything was alright, then proceeds to have a meeting with another coworker of mine for the remainder of my shift. As the adrenaline wears down, and the day remains busy with a lot to do, I begin asking myself, “Why the fuck am I still here?”. I begin digesting what happened today, while my frustration is growing. At this point its nearing the time that I'm supposed to be off, and I begin asking if his meeting with my coworker (who was coming in for their shift after me) was almost over. 3 times he reassured me that they were finishing up at which point I'm already 20 minutes past my leaving time. I probably wouldn't have been so stressed if it wasn't my 1 year anniversary with my partner haha.
Fast forward to the next day after talking with my family, I ask to have a talk with my boss about the incident and what I was feeling. I expressed that I felt that the way my situation was handled made me feel as if it wasn't a big deal, and that I felt like I was sort of abandoned. My boss expressed that because of my reassurance that he really assumed that I was okay and that I was fine to continue working. He shared that at his father's business, crazy events would happen, but they were able to brush it off and continue on. I argued that YES, I reassured him to comfort him. I wanted to be a supportive employee, and coworker. I was trying to stay strong. I explained that despite all of that, I felt like he should've made an executive decision to remove me from my shift that day. To make sure that I was actually okay. I felt this way because by this point we have been told that we're all a family and that we have each others back. On that day however I felt no support from anyone. It was only by the end of that week that my coworkers offered to cover me for a few days to try and take some time to myself.
After a week of sitting on it, I decided that it was time that I begin searching for a new job, as I didn't feel that staying there would not be healthy for me. But the assault wasn't the only reason why I left. Like I said before, I poured my heart and soul into my work. I made seasonal drinks and recipes, I trained and educated staff, managed and placed inventory orders, worked with management and shift leads to implement new work and training policies. I worked hard for these responsibilities over those three years. But in all that time, I only made 75 cents more than minimum wage. I noticed patterns. My coworker cut themselves on accident with a box cutter while on the clock, but when they took her to the ER, they asked her not to say it was a workplace incident. They opened a new location when none of their long term employees ever got a pay bump.
I am posting this here today because I need to hear opinions from an outside perspective. I still live in the same community, and I interact with old coworkers every now and then. I see my old job's instagram and their posts. Things like a team building workshop on how they want to “create life visions and empower their employees”. The comments from customers saying how much they wish all businesses cared about their staff as much as they do. And every time I see this, I feel this ugly and cold feeling of anger inside of me. I know that there were probably so many things I could've done better. But regardless, whenever I see the business, I feel like I was abandoned, and I want to get over it, but I'm met with reminders everyday.