I think I just need to vent.
I work in the animal field, first as a tech and receptionist at a vet clinic, then moved into lab animal research. I loved my work at the clinic, but the bullying was insane. Every single thing that ever went wrong was somehow my fault. Yet they always piled the extra work on me, even when I said I was overwhelmed. And then the bullying started. Constantly pushed around and gossiped about behind my back, no matter how nice and open I tried to be with my coworkers.
So I was excited to start fresh. I did everything I could to try and make my coworkers like me. I went the extra mile, I asked to advance at my work and take on extra tasks to impress them. I worked hard, did favors for them.
But the bullying started again. They talked about me behind my back. This time outright lying to my manager to get me in trouble, while making themselves look good. Getting my pay docked for “time theft” (despite them also leaving early, their pay was not docked.) Claiming I’m not completing my work tasks (despite me finishing my tasks early, usually so much so that I even do extra tasks or help them with their tasks.) Claiming they never take extra breaks and I do (one is usually on Instagram, the other running her side hustle Airbnb).
I don’t have a problem with criticism. If it’s a problem, and I can fix it, I will gladly take it. But there’s nothing I can do. I’m already doing my best and trying my hardest. Aside from staying later, which none of my coworkers do. That’s really the only behavior I can correct.
It just feels hopeless. Like no matter where I go, what I do, I will be targeted and bullied. I know I’m neurodivergent, and have high anxiety so maybe my attempts to be their friends has just backfired but I don’t know what else to do. It just feels like I’m not cut out to work anywhere. Or at all. I always feel like a nuisance.
Is there any solution to this?