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Antiwork

Can we talk about the lack of support when it’s needed the most?

I work at a big company in a new role (that no one at the company has done before) with a manager who is very new to managing. It’s a high stress position, lots of “moving pieces” but it’s a cool opportunity and I love what I do. Here’s the thing… my manager is hard to work with. I think I would like her outside of work, but at work she’s temperamental and only nice to me if I’m excelling. I love the praise but I also need support in times when I am open about struggling to manage the workload. Instead I am greeted with coldness. No advice, just clear frustration from her when I need the support the absolute most. The Sunday scaries are back and her demeanor makes me hesitant to tell her any challenges I’m facing which, I thought, is what managers were for. Why does…


I work at a big company in a new role (that no one at the company has done before) with a manager who is very new to managing. It’s a high stress position, lots of “moving pieces” but it’s a cool opportunity and I love what I do.

Here’s the thing… my manager is hard to work with. I think I would like her outside of work, but at work she’s temperamental and only nice to me if I’m excelling. I love the praise but I also need support in times when I am open about struggling to manage the workload. Instead I am greeted with coldness. No advice, just clear frustration from her when I need the support the absolute most.

The Sunday scaries are back and her demeanor makes me hesitant to tell her any challenges I’m facing which, I thought, is what managers were for.

Why does it feel like some managers are only there to scrutinize and praise but nothing in between? It’s making me want to leave this (otherwise awesome) job.

Any advice on what to do?

TLDR – manager is only communicative and helpful when I am doing well and don’t need her help.

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