I'm not interested in suing the company, I just want to know if I will ever recover. I'm 37 years old now. From the time I was 28 until I was 31, I was a supervisor at an industrial plant. I accepted the job because I needed the money but from day one I could tell something was very wrong. I suddenly had zero libido and I was suddenly stressed and sleep deprived. I was the first shift supervisor but they had no second or third shift supervisor, so I was unfortunately on call all the time. I very rarely got a full night's sleep. At work I was regularly exposed to exhaust fumes and mill dust that contained carbon monoxide, mercury, and silica in a fine particulate, airborne form. I repeatedly asked my manager for permission to report the carbon monoxide poisoning to the safety department and was repeatedly told in a condescending tone that I was perfectly safe and there was no need for a report. I'm not sure if it was the stress, the sleep deprivation, or the carbon monoxide, but I barely remember this part of my life. I may as well have been black out drunk the entire time. I endured this job for 3 years. Six months after I turned 31, I finally got a job offer from an automotive plant in a neighboring town and I thought it was finally over. I gave my resignation to my boss and I thought I that I would recover and be okay.
But it's now 2022, I'm currently 37 years old, and I still have an impaired libido and my memory hasn't fully recovered. I can't remember things that I should remember. I can't remember things that I would've remembered when I was in the early part of my career, before that awful industrial plant. This year, my mom gave me a Christmas gift (a shirt) and I left it in my living room after the holiday. Ever since then, I would go into my living room every day and wonder why there was a shirt there. I figured it must've belonged to one of my roommates. Today my mom came to visit and saw the shirt and asked me if it fit. I realized then that it was my shirt, but I had zero memory of her giving it to me. This is textbook carbon monoxide poisoning. I'm not currently being exposed, so this is clearly the lingering effects of the prior exposure. But how long will it last?! I'm sick of this! I want to remember my life.