I am feeling so discouraged from working. I have been a registered nurse 3 years, my first two years were really hard because I worked in a Covid ICU. Started seeing my EAP counselor and got the courage to cut my hours from full time to per diem and got another job and my schedule was amazing and I was happier at work. Just didn’t have health insurance anymore and paid out of pocket for private insurance which wasn’t bad until I got an infection and realized I had to pay even more on top of monthly payments and that sucked.
Long story short, got depressed and didn’t have family so decided to move to California to be closer to family. Got new job working dialysis, it’s easy but the company and the hours are making me hate my life. I’ve started applying for a bunch of part time nursing jobs because I believe most offer health insurance still and I’ll be happier having more control of my hours, I don’t even care if I don’t make enough. I’ll eat cereal. But I find myself falling into depression again, and with this discouraged feeling decided to reach out to my company’s EAP. Took them almost 2 weeks to find me a counselor, and now that I’m set up and they got my paperwork so it’s covered by my employer, I can’t find any availability. Counselor just said to keep checking dates.
Also just got notified that my birth control isn’t covered anymore and it charged me out of pocket fees this month, so I asked for a refund and said there must be a mistake because I got it every month without any out of pocket fees, but they said nope, not this time. I didn’t even change insurance, it’s still with my same current employer. I can’t even get a primary care doctor yet because appointments are months out. I looked all over for where I can go with my insurance, I just want a damn checkup and annual pap before I quit and potentially lose health insurance again.
As a registered nurse, the work life balance isn’t good enough, but i can’t imagine working 5 days a week. The work is incredibly draining, but i can do it if it’s part time, my mental health can’t really take full time. And health insurance is insane, even for someone that works in the hospital like myself. I’m so discouraged and feel like giving up.
I don’t meant to complain but it’s hard. An older coworker recently vented to me about his tough week and how he works 3 jobs as a respiratory therapist, 1 is full time and he’s been doing it as long as he can remember. He retires in a few years. I mentioned my own struggle and he basically just said “you gotta suck it up, you’re young. And this is how it is.”
I don’t truly know my purpose of this post besides venting. But I think we work too many hours in the US, full time isn’t even enough to afford basic needs sometimes, and I’m tired of feeling the constant desire to just go without health insurance and risk it just because it is useless to me anyways it seems still and I need that extra money.