I am the dad, but hey, clickbait title!
I (35M) did a great job, skills and knowledge of the space second to none. This was confirmed in the meeting laying me off. I was a freelancer before, different field, this work was more of a hobby interest and it really flourished. I turned out to be great at it and everything was going well. This was my first 9-5 office job, past a year at Uni working in industry.
About 6-7 months in, I got called out by the boss for spending too much time on my mobile / social media. Some work research related, some not. Did I mention I had a newborn at that point? So, lots of drama with my girlfriend, everyone feeling like garbage, its our first, many unknown, we have no family help so she was flying solo. The moms and dads here know.
New year comes, I have straightened out that stuff, going really well. Ironically I get placed as head of social media because of my knowledge, personality and communication skills. So I guess that isn't an issue now huh?
Big project launching end of the year, I'm building towards that. No fixed date. Making great strides with everything. Having a baby in October, told them about it in May or April, I can't quite remember now.
Friday I signed off on a new house, excited, was on my phone a bunch on Friday morning with gf, making plans. Late with delivering some work (not time-sensitive). Fine, my bad…. not the end of the world. Most of the time, everything is gravy.
Monday morning I come in, get called for a one on one meeting, straight to it, this and that happened on Friday, we have spoken in the past about being on your phone and distracted. Boss can't say the words that I'm fired, signed letter in front of him, bursts into tears and covers his facefor 5 minutes sobbing. He's spoken with the other bosses and he has it all organized that I have to go.Tells me he hasn't slept for days, was angry, didn't know what to do. Then tells me come back in on Friday and see what we can do.
Keep in mind that he did not say anything to me at the end of the previous week. He told me he asked the others if they knew if anything was up with me. Then didn't get round to asking me directly. I'm not spilling all my personal life to them as it breaks, so obvs noone knew. One guy did and he's a bit of a suckup, so he wouldn't have mentioned it or stood up for the fact much, but fine.
Instead, boss got in a huff, contacted the other bosses (who are rarely there and are purely about the numbers) and they all signed off to get me sacked. Pay me the next month (I have 16 days holiday left but sure, feel like you're doing me a favor) and send me packing.
Here is the twist. The office is made up of early to mid 20s folks who go in early and stay late. I work my hours and leave to the minute, I have a family and a lot more to do in life. Some go in on weekends because they feel they need to get ahead. Keep in mind this was a decent work environment, this isn't encouraged (or discouraged). But, I stand out as the guy with anything else to do.
Anyway, the fact I come in to the minute and leave to the minute was brought up in the firing meeting as a comment, not a reason but just an “aside” that with the new projects launching there might be extra work and more hours needed and I wouldn't be there for that… so THAT'S the reason, I think. Everyone checks their phone, everyone has the odd bad day, and my girlfriend is 6 months pregnant with a toddler. But I am apparently a bad influence by having all these distractions, for the rest of the office. Yes… a life. Such a terrible distraction for all these young'uns.
Funnily enough, boss has kids. Obvs, doesnt see them plenty / they come and draw in the meeting room and stuff. He's in first, out last, most days.
By the end he can't bring himself to give me the letter, tells me to come up with some stuff and come back in on Friday and we can talk. As an aside, he has made some wild decisions with the business in the last 12 months. Its a startup, sure, but we have done a few full 180s about what we are doing and what each of us needs to do and what the direction of the business is. Also, the investors are loaded and they outsource thousands to total cowboys for marketing plans and all sorts. anyway….
Contacted a few colleagues. He basically told them I messed up last week and HE had to work late, but he gave me some stuff to do and come back on Friday, he will give me an official warning. He is 100% regretting his decision. If this was professional wrestling, or sports, I would be locker room leader / captain. I was their first employee, on-boarded almost everyone and I am the go-to guy to ask for pretty much anything that isn't web development etc. I am the go-between guy for stuff the others want to ask the boss but don't have the courage, and so on.
Thing is, I have zero trust, zero respect and zero time for this kind of nonsense. They know my circumstances, and they are trying to push me out for not being an office zombie. Right before I am having another baby. Ignoring the fact I am the most capable and experienced worker there by far. So I will bow out, even if he offers me to stay with an “official warning”. Its humiliating, demotivating and changes the whole dynamic. The office will be a pit of despair without me and they will have to outsource so much. Ignoring the fact that these cowboys that get the work sent to them get paid double or triple what the employees do. No coincidence the bosses are foreign to this country..
Long story short, its much easier for them to kick me out on some minor bullshit brought up 8-9 months after the last time it was a problem than manage my holiday and parental leave (and all that comes afterwards with being a zombie with a newborn). I guess in the US I could sue, but I don't know if I can in my country. On paper, they have other reasons for my dismissal.
I'm not perfect, and maybe if I was, I would have stayed. I guess I'm just looking for some sympathy and “hey there are a million remote jobs for x y z you can do”. Thanks boys and girls. Fuck 9-5.