I initially wrote this in another group but I find this relatable here too concerning the absolute toxicity nobody has to go through at work.
I need to vent this out because I am disgusted and appalled. I work as a teacher, I was pregnant keeping it a secret and I had certain symptoms that indicated red flags so I requested if I could take few hours off so I could see the doctor and I would be back at work, I explained it was because of something serious medically. I was asked on the day of the appointment if I could “ make it fast” because my replacement who is my boss has a “ very busy schedule”, I said I would try my best.
At the appointment I was not prepared by what followed which was I was having miscarriage. I was assessed by a psychologist and doctor and given mr state of shock but also the physical complications they gave me one week off to deal with what is happening.
When I got out of the appointment, I told my boss sorry for the delay it took longer than what I thought and before I could even respond, she told me “ well you need to give medical note and the higher up wants a meeting with you”. Meanwhile, I never done anything wrong at my work, always present and trying my best and have taken 2 days off for illness in six months, never missed work or was late any other reason. I told her no problem here is my note, as I explained something has happened to me medically, and this was the time given to me. I said I don’t feel comfortable talking about it just yet l but respect my privacy in that it’s something serious.
Her response was to say that since I knew I would have all this time off, I could have just told her, and it’s not okie for me to take days off because me being gone means the jeopardy of my class which she needs to take care of now and basically blaming me for all the consequence for my “Medical leave” .
I am horrified, you tell someone something serious happened to you medically and my distress Is completely and totally ignored and guilt tripped. This truly shows me true colours and totally disappointed, what kind of monsters are there working in management ? Where your medical emergency is dismissed and threaten to be spoken to with higher ups. I told her that I had never planned in advance to have these days off, I cannot predict what happened to me, this is the time needed and I’m in a state of shock and this is an emergency I’m sorry if it puts the class at risk but my health is important.
In the end after some hours she said I could always come to her for help. No not after this completely un empathetic treatment against another human being. I just felt I needed to vent this somewhere, maybe other people have similar experiences.
Update **************
After this occurred, a colleague who is extremely noisy and I barely speak to, send me a message asking me flat out if I’m pregnant because apparently she happens to find in the garbage of our school someones tests, and she was assuming they are mine ( I know this a flat out lie and she’s just trying to understand why I’m absent, I dunno what sane person hunts through the school trash bin to find tests and then starts calling people out). Jokes on her because I never any tests in school. The amount that’s happening to witch hunt me during a period of incredible pain is amazing. Your stories gave me strength to stand up for myself and my rights. I told her firstly they are not mine and it’s very rude to contact people asking them such personal questions, considering you fetched them from the trash obviously someone wants to keep it a secret and it’s not your business to out people. Secondly you and nobody else have no right to my medical history and conditions, my doctors note is loud and clear and it’s not up to you to play detective, this is an ethical right I have and I don’t owe you anything, my word is suffice, if you contact me again with any further enquires about my absence I will consider it harassment as you are creating rumours and speculations when I explained I wanted to be left alone so respect my privacy !