I work remotely and most of my job is managing people’s cases and assisting them with their problems through a solution in boundaries of company policy.
I had experience anxiety time to time since covid lockdowns but it was always manageable and I never told anyone about this nor did I let it affect me.
4 days ago we had to work onsite as new joinees were coming in our team and I have also recently joined this company and it’s my 6th month here. I went to the office all excited and motivated that I’ll meet my team for the first time as we all work remotely and never had the chance to really meet each other. I arrived at the office and found out that I’m the only one who came to the office along with the 2 new team members. I was disappointed and even both my managers were on leave that day, everyone called in sick after the long weekend and from the team of 12-13 people only I was there. I sat down and opened my laptop and my heart started racing. I could not breathe and finally gathered up the courage to speak to other department manager who was on-site and i had a mental break down and I started crying and I was not sure about the reason. They were supportive and asked my to take some time off and booked me a cab and clocked me out.
I’m sitting at home since then and have seek professional help. I am having a mental breakdown multiple times a day since that day and i finally gathered up the courage to ask for some time off for 3 weeks to focus my myself and be back to normal. I have a meeting with HR relating this issue and my mind can’t stop thinking about this on what I would do next.
A little background – I’ve seen like 12-15 employees leave the time since I joined. Company hires new people and gives them training for 3 weeks and when the new joinees start their real work, they leave within 1-2 days. I got hired along with 4 other employees and I’m the only one left from that lot. Everyone has left due to high work stress and the little to no support from management to address this issue has made a lot older employees leave work as well. They always ask for suggestions but never implement anything.
My job has been a lot hard lately due to people leaving, their work load is transferred to current employees. For now I’m just lost and am having such frequent breakdowns that I can’t focus on anything and it has started affecting my day-to-day activities. All I think about is my pending cases that are getting piled up. I’m not sure what to do next-if I should quit or take some time off and return with a better mental health.
Wanted to write this all down to take it out of my mind. Any suggestions on what I should do next?