It seems obvious (& it kinda is) but lately I've been wondering if some of my mental health issues can be attributed to my 12+ years in various customer service roles. Specifically in regards to guilt, self-worth, over-apologizing, people pleasing, neglecting & devaluing my own needs/wants/well-being, etc. This includes the impact of my interactions with customers, coworkers, supervisors, & corporate culture at large.
For example, I have an illogical knee-jerk reaction to assume that any & all bad things that happen around me are always my fault, even when presented concrete evidence to the contrary. Could this be linked to how I am constantly yelled at by customers for a never-ending list of things that are outside my control? Even when customers know that I personally am not the one at fault, I am still the one that gets yelled at. “Not taking it personally” can only go so far after over a decade of verbal abuse.
Could my relationship with guilt also be tied to the way my company (and many others) measures my performance (and also my bonus &/or any potential disciplinary actions) against metrics that I also cannot control? For instance, if a customer calls back within 14 days about an issue on an order I helped them with, my metrics suffer (even if the reason for their call is completely unrelated to whatever I originally helped them with.) Similarly, if a customer gives me anything less than a 5/5 on their satisfaction survey, even when the customer puts IN WRITING that the lower score was due to something outside my control (company policies, shipper errors, etc.) my metrics still suffer for this.
Any mistakes, even ones that aren't my fault (even if/when I have evidence to support this) can result in disciplinary action from my employer. The financial stability of myself & my family is at stake should anything at all go wrong on any call/order I handle. I've been in slightly different versions of this same situation over & over with different companies across several unrelated industries. How can a person's psyche NOT be affected after years of this kind of treatment??
(PS: If all you're going to comment is “just get a job that isn't in customer service” then please keep scrolling instead. Don't waste your time, or mine. Thanks!)