EDIT: Can’t edit the title but the coworker is making disparaging comments to me and not the other way around I phrased it incorrectly !
Hi All,
I hope it’s ok to post this here.
I work in finance.
I have a coworker who started a few days before me. They are about 20 years older than me. From the get go we have had issues where my work (and frankly I) have been belittled by them. Because they began before me they were given the lead of the team, this has added fuel to the fire. Another coworker started and quit because of their behaviour. (Eg, this co worker and I were laughing about something and we were sushed, they accused them of being racist which was so far from the truth it was laughable ).Another coworker is on the way out because of it. It will happen with the next person and the next and I am the only person other than them left. I, categorically cannot continue being in the same space as this person anymore. Most recently, their behaviour has gotten worse and a lot more pedantic. I spoke to my manager after one situation and cried (embarrassing I know) about the situation. My manager discussed it with us, the issue was resolved. This often happens with short term results where the coworker backs down and apologises. Now they have found another issue. Not to give away information as I don’t know who is is on this, but there was something that they wanted done with the office that I didn’t agree with (this will be the 3rd time I have accommodated them on this issue). I had an adult conversation (no manager involved) , said I would not be accommodating them again and that they had several different options to get around the scenario. It’s not a big thing but frankly I have enough and I know once this issue is resolved another will pop up. I recently have taken some PTO and found out from someone else the day before that the mentioned coworker has decided to make the afore mentioned change in the office specifically when I am away and said they were purposely doing it when I’m gone. I am at a loss of what to do. I love my job but I can’t continue with this on a regular basis. The mentioned situation is one of several issues which have cropped up. Other issues include; taking credit for my work but if they do something wrong it becomes a ‘we’ thing, cussing when I’m on a call so the client possibly thinks it’s me (they usually do this when I say goodbye to the person so as I am putting down the phone the client would hear this), purposely ostracising me from coworkers , belittling my job, ignoring vital work emails leaving me to pick up the pieces, speak about me to coworkers behind my back, throwing me under the bus in front of my manager, saying one thing to me and another to other colleagues making me look crazy (they have done this with the new coworker also who pointed it out to me and is equally as frustrated). Frankly at this stage I feel like I’m being driven over the edge my paranoia is at an all time high and I want this sorted. I love my job and everyone else in this company. Should I come back to find this change in the office, I need to speak to my manager and bring this all to a head, I would like some advice on how I should approach this so that I am taken seriously.
Thank you in advance.