I haven't enjoyed my job in two years. I haven't liked what I've done. I've hated the work. I've hated most of my coworkers. I finally found an amazing company and a fundamentalist Christian woman stabbed me in the back and threatened to sue the company for religious discrimination because she wasn't allowed to post sermons in Slack. So she decided to take me, an atheist, down. I quit right there because I was so heartbroken.
Now I'm stuck at a company with shitty PTO run by people whose culture isn't pro-laborer. My coworker is a huge piece of shit, but only to me. Our boss loves him and everyone loves him because he's good at his job. I don't even care if I'm called racist, but the culture of people from India has resonated through several jobs I've worked at, and I'm so tired of my boss telling me to deal with his cultural differences.
NO.
I refuse to work with someone who treats me like this. I don't care about cultural differences. FUCK THIS. Fuck all of this. I'm torn between quitting right now and rolling the dice on getting a new job, or giving up entirely and living on my savings for a hot minute.
But I have student loans. I have rent. And I want a job that fulfills me SO BADLY. I'm good at what I do. I love doing it. But the fact that I've been in roles that either don't have meaningful work or put me into toxic situations that just…I'm not suicidal, but I have no enthusiasm for life. I haven't for a long time. The only reason I loved that job so deeply is because it was the first time in a while where I was doing something that gave me a reason to wake up.
This is how it's always gonna be, isn't it? I'm working toward retirement because I want to quit the workforce in my mid thirties and study bees for the rest of my life.
Fuck, dude. We spend 40+ hours of our week doing this shit. The least they could do is fucking care about us.
I'm definitely whining, but spending 40+ hours a week in misery, plus the way it spills over into my non-working hours just kills me.