eta: I know this is a long read, I'm sorry, I really would appreciate the input of maybe someone who has dealt with this before or just anyone with more experience than I!
It already cost me a bunch of jobs without me realizing, my last job I asked my manager when leaving if I could use them as a reference and they said yeah at the time (Aug2022), but the last place I had an interview for ended up falling through even though I thought I had a really great interview with them(Jan2023). I ended up just asking the hiring person what went wrong and they told me they loved me and were going to hire me until what my last manager said about me (not lies perse, but out of context sound really bad on paper, I had a mental break and didn't leave me bed for days, I thought I was being stalked and my manager ended up calling the cops on me for a wellness check which kind of made it worse but I contacted her after the cops left cause they told me to, I just never told her why I didn't come in beyond I was struggling mentally). I was really sad, went to msg them on the fb I made for that work to find they deleted me so I couldn't msg them there, and decided not to bother texting them bc I was just too confused and upset. I haven't really applied to any places since bc I felt it was a lost cause and just crawled deeper into my depression pit.
Fast forward to now, I got the motivation to apply to a couple more job listing earlier today and one already called me back for a phone interview for next week! I'm just really worried about not having references, and all my other jobs I've had tbh ended badly for one reason or another (the one that would be the most applicable to the job I'm interviewing for I had reported to HR for multiple terrible things going on and none of them have a positive opinion of me now for disturbing status quo).
So I ask, how terrible would it be to use fake references?? I know its probably illegal in some way, unethical maybe sure, but is it really so bad to consider? My other option is just telling them the truth, that I report companies to HR when they repeatedly do things that they shouldn't and leave jobs with no notice when I'm being treated terribly (I.e high-school level of petty bullying and gossip with no word from the higher ups, if they're not already doing it themselves, s.harrassment, etc) like I've just been really unlucky with the jobs I've had, the one where I thought I had a good reference was the only one not toxic like that and she's the one who keeps giving me a bad reference so I'm just sort of at a loss.
I really need a job, any job but the one I'm interviewing for sounds so nice and fun, I want to get this one if I can! I'm just not sure professional hiring ppl will hear my side and think “oh yeah, they're the one we want, no references needed!” Its just a low level retail position, but still.
Advice please on how I should approach this?