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Antiwork

I, The Manager, Am About To Quit

I have posted about being put on a BS PIP a few weeks back. Well, I decided to use up all my sick time. With me gone, everything fell apart pretty damned quickly, because no one else knows how to do what I do. I saw the frantic emails upon my return. I admit to sniggering a little. Suddenly, they were giving me some training and resources, which I have been requesting for months and which they had been withholding. I thought it was a good sign. Why invest the time and resources if they're going to fire me? Maybe that week without me taught them a lesson! Of course, I didn't pause my job hunt for even a second. I am not a moron. Well, it's possible I might be able to keep my job, but the price has been revealed. The VPs are pulling all kinds of crap.…


I have posted about being put on a BS PIP a few weeks back. Well, I decided to use up all my sick time. With me gone, everything fell apart pretty damned quickly, because no one else knows how to do what I do. I saw the frantic emails upon my return. I admit to sniggering a little.

Suddenly, they were giving me some training and resources, which I have been requesting for months and which they had been withholding. I thought it was a good sign. Why invest the time and resources if they're going to fire me? Maybe that week without me taught them a lesson! Of course, I didn't pause my job hunt for even a second. I am not a moron.

Well, it's possible I might be able to keep my job, but the price has been revealed. The VPs are pulling all kinds of crap. This week, I heard quite a bit of whining about my team not retaining a bunch of training sessions that were done six years ago. None of us were even here six years ago. The people who were ran for the hills long ago, and they left no documentation behind. So, exasperated, the VPs and engineers started doing a ton of training sessions with my direct reports. They expect them to document the training. In the meantime, that means they have far less time to work on tickets. I noticed the ticket numbers had gone down a bit, but I wasn't particularly concerned. I saw it as a one-off due to being assigned to other tasks.

Well, the VPs didn't see it that way. They're demanding I do coaching sessions with them, document the sessions, and document the poor numbers. I'm on a PIP, so they think I am so desperate that I will go along with this. I am documenting what the numbers are, but I am also adding notes about the training and extra time spent on documentation.

I have a meeting with the VP tomorrow. I will be telling him that the drop in numbers is temporary and due to the training and documentation work. I will suggest spreading out the training over a longer period if they need the numbers to jump right away. But if he tries to get me to write them up, well, I won't.

I (probably) have a job lined up. It's a pay cut, but I need to get out. We're just trying to get a solid start date setup (hence the word “probably”). If they solidify the start date before this job fires me, I won't be giving notice. I know all about the advice about not burning bridges, but I would have to throw good people under the bus to keep those bridges intact. So why bother giving notice at this point?

I really hate corporate America…

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