I don’t know what to do anymore. I was a para educator. I used to work with special education kids. I had PTSD. I just closed it when I was hired. I requested accommodation after being hired. I requested it multiple times. It wasn’t until two years after I was hired that it became an absolute necessity.
I experienced one of my triggers live action. And that was when I found out my boss never put any accommodation in. I’ve been left crying and it’s only been getting worse. I don’t know what to do. I’m technically homeless right now. I don’t have a job. I run out of PTSD medication in a couple of weeks. I am really scared.
When I experience that trigger, my boss actually came into the room as I was breaking down, crying, and told me that if I couldn’t handle it, I shouldn’t work there. From that point forward, she made my life a living hell. She even posted pictures of my trigger around the building , she pointed out my trigger and made fun of me for it on a separate occasion. I was in her office almost every single week for eight months straight when I have never been in trouble before it all. . I don’t know how to ask for help. I don’t know how to do any of this stuff. But I don’t know what to do anymore.
They fired me for creating a hostile work environment. I filed multiple complaints with the state. No one will listen to me. I can’t afford a lawyer. I don’t even have a house of my own, let alone an apartment. Since being fired from my elementary school job I have been , unable to hold down anything. I see my trigger and I can’t handle it. I have been crying for almost 3 hours straight tonight. I can’t watch any of my shows or movies that I would usually find comfort in. They all have people that resemble my trigger. my boss took advantage of my vulnerability and then kept going at it, making things worse and worse. And now I’m scared that I won’t belong anywhere. I can’t even get a news station to hear me. I just wanted to be treated equal, but they wouldn’t even put the paperwork in. I didn’t find out until 2 1/2 years later.
At this point, I think that I might be hospitalized. I don’t want to be because that is worse than just getting treatment. If I could afford any of that I would. Every lawyer I talk to wants several hundred dollars upfront one of them wanted several thousand. And I would just like to be able to make my car payment or be able to afford my trazodone. It’s the only thing keeping me sane right now and I can’t go without it because the withdrawals will be hell, I can’t tell you how many people have told me to just forget it. I can’t forget it. I see it every time something goes on. It’s me curled up in the corner of the room while my students leave and I’m just crying alone while my boss mocks me.
I need help.
Please. Someone with some actual connection – please just listen to me. I have hundreds of pages of documentation. I have hours and hours of recordings. But every time I talk to another lawyer, they hear me to fairly a weeks worth of this 15 months journey and they tell me it’s a big case and that they can’t do anything.