I've got a really bad work history. Been hopping jobs for the last 4 years like a maniac because I had no direction, and I admit I was stupid. Now that I'm serious and want to change, it's too late – my CV is fucked, and I don't get any emails or calls for interviews whatsoever.
I have taught myself all the technical skills necessary for the job that I want (software development) but I have never actually done it as a job. I've accepted I'm going to have to lie.
So, how do I get away with it and not get caught?