I do a pot washing job and I hate it, stare at the same wall, same sink in the same room for 8 hours a day 5 days a week. It's driving me insane, I can just feel my mental health slipping away. Dirty plates, cutlery and pots, pans, etc none stop coming from a Conveyor belt. My personal hell, I've never thought I'd hate anything more in life. Theres no one to talk to there either so not like I can pass the time with someone either. I've only been doing this job for a month and a half now. Yesterday I got so close to just putting down what I was doing and leaving.
Though the bigger issue is with getting to work and my manager. The company I work for has a private work bus that you have to book seats to get on, theres been some days that I've not been able to come into work due to this issue and my manager hates it. And the occasional mental health day that I've called in sick for. (Only a total of 4 or 5 days off through out my probation period and it doesn't look good.) My manager is also the type of guy who don't believe in sick days and thinks their a load of made up bs. My manager takes it out on me when I've not been able to make it in and to be honest it's terrifying, I'm not a confrontational person at all. I'm usually quiet and keep to myself, fairly socially awkward if I have to admit and I don't like that about myself, I wish I knew how to stand up for myself.
Then because the work bus times have changed I'm not going to have to wait around at work an extra hour until the bus arrives to take me home, from before it was right at the end of my shift. Just thinking of all those hours adding up and all the things I could be doing something productive in that hour of nothing. (The bus ride itself takes an hour to get to work and an hour to get home) Also due to the bus time change, I wasn't sure how it would effect my early mornings of getting on the bus and I missed the bus. Though I've gotten no call or text from work at all which sorta triggers my anxiety that he's mad at me.
Now through all this I'm debating just not showing up anymore so I don't have to face all this mess I'm in and also to save my own mental health and sanity of a job I can't stand another second of. I know this isn't professional but I was going to send in a text saying the job isn't for me and I won't be returning anymore. I'd probably be fired anyway, so I wanna quit before I get fired so I leave on my own terms.
I'm in my early 20s somewhat going into mid 20s and live with my dad and his gf, I've been talking to them about this issue but they are getting upset and disappointed that I'll go jobless. I'm also worried since job applications rarely ever respond. It won't look good for the next job I go for that I'm unemployed, for a specific amount of time so I need a new job fast.