I’m not anti-work, I’m just exhausted…
& a bit terrified.
Its been almost 3 months since I’ve been employed. While this has been a much-needed breather, I actually miss some small things about working; small-talk with coworkers, human-interaction, learning stuff, money… But all those things don’t excuse the mistreatment & unrealistic expectations set by a corrupt management. It wears on you, work becomes ‘soul-crushing’, & you’re made to feel inadequate. As some of you can probably tell by now, most of my job experiences have been in retail. I just turned 26. Since I was 20 my goal was to break the threshold of entry-level position, into management. However something crappy always happens to prevent this, or the harassment/work conditions just become to unbearable. Ive even been promised promotions, but usually its just management teasing me to make me work harder. What I learned is promotions in retail are hardly ever dictated upon how hard you work or how much you know, its rather based upon image & favoritism. If that weren’t the case I’m sure id be in upper management somewhere. Once I become familiar with my place of work, I become obsessed at being efficient at my job.. Which has partially led to this very bad burn-out I’ve been feeling. My last job at which I will just hint: (bullseye). Management traumatized me. My last boss was a verbally abusive, exploitive, maniac. Everybody there HATED him. Nobody liked him. He’s yelled at me over nothing before & was just generally extremely disrespectful. Pretty sure the only reason he was there because he was with the company for like 20+years & he acted busy. This a-hole almost got in trouble for s-harassment on a minor, just to paint how much of a scum he is. This man put me through hell, but in the end I was good at my job. I cant say I was the best but I was top 3, & I was fast. There was so much talk of promotion a half-year into me working there. But they always wanted more. When it was time for promotions& the position I wanted was open “I wasn’t ready” There was a few good candidates but nobody got a promotion. They just hired someone externally & I trained the literal newbie for the position I was teased to get. I got a small write-up for some utter bs months later & I snapped. Instead of just quitting I tried to transfer & get into the warehouse but I think he blacklisted me in petty retaliation for me putting my foot down. I don’t know if retails for me anymore. I honestly would love to work, but I also enjoy my dignity. Thinking about going back to restaurant work for time-being. My career plan is to get into trade-school, I’m interested in carpentry, I hope its not too late.