Old timers AT* my job are trying to force me to quit because they hate the change & authority I am bringing. I have never worked in a place so hostile and toxic and I feel like this may be an actual case, but I am not sure how to proceeed.
I am a younger woman (under 30) working in a position that is technically authority over everyone else in the workplace because I am corporate and I am a director of a certain department (trying to keep it vague here for privacy reasons). Ever since I got here, I have been fought on EVERYTHING by these older male coworkers that are “under me” AKA have to listen to me because I am a corporate director. They are all 55+ and have worked at this place for over 20 years, so they are all very close to each other and have done things the same way for a long time. No other woman is in a position of power over them. I have tried to be very nice, tried to get them to like me, tried to be the hardass, but no matter what, they are awful to me. They intentionally try to sabotage my projects, they argue with me over every little thing, they talk over me and do not listen to me, they undermine my work and make important decisions without me, and they keep trying to force me to do things THEIR way even though they have no real education or experience in my field and are not hired to do MY work, but they are supposed to help me carry out different aspects of the project. “Well I want this to be this way because I said so, because we've always done it this way, because I want it to be this way-” and etc.
Last week was one of the worst weeks. One of our projects ended up being a disaster because of these older male coworkers interfering with my job due to all the reasons listed above and more, such as forcing decisions onto me about how things need to be, and then those things end up being a huge detriment to the project.
Well, after all of this happened, I came into work to my desk absolutely destroyed. All of my notes were destroyed. My work on my whiteboard was erased. All of my trinkets and personal items were thrown everywhere, hidden, placed INSIDE of my fridge, under the chairs, my computer was unplugged. I kept finding more and more things wrong with my desk and eventually I felt so dirty and violated. At first I thought it was just my coworker friend playing tricks on me, but he swore it wasn't him and he was very upset about it for me. Here's the kicker- he has also had his desk vandalized multiple times before, and he is the only other young corporate employee in an authority position over the older male coworkers. He is the same age as me and is my only friend there. Weird how NO ONE else's desks in the entire office (which is about 15) have never ever been touched except the only two young (under 30) corporate directors that are allowed to make decisions over other directors (my older male coworkers are also directors but they are not corporate so they have to do what I ask them to do).
I confronted one of the older male coworkers about the whole thing and he just brushed it off. While everyone else was completely horrified for me. Then he shrugged, said it must have been the night crew, then walked away. Very suspicious….
My boss has no idea any of this is going on because he has been traveling the past month. I am planning on telling him next week (I took this week off because I have been so stressed about what is going on). Part of me wants to quit, but I know these people want me to quit. I work part time remotely and part time in office, but I want to use this to petition to have me work 99% remotely now. I cleared out my desk completely the last day I was in. I don't even feel safe there anymore.
Here is the worst part…. I am making more money than I ever have, more than my parents ever have. Nothing obscence. But finally enough to feel like I can breathe. I finally have a little bit of a savings and an opportunity to pay off my debt. I never had that with another job. So I feel like I can't leave. I want to leave so badly but I will be giving up financial security and my career will be set back. Who knows if I will get a job in this position with this pay again.
I am calling a meeting next week with my boss to tell him what is going on, but part of me also wants to include my two older male coworkers and stress to them how serious (and frankly CRIMINAL) the situation is. I will not accuse them because I have no real proof it was them. But I do want to scare them, and I know that if I use the words “workplace harassment”, “destruction of personal property”, and “vandalism”, they will feel uncomfortable and hopefully be discouraged from lashing out at me again. Or I could just meet with my boss and explain to him privately everything that is going on, but who knows if he will actually take real action to address it. My boss seems pretty reasonable but he has been working with these people for literally 20 years. I feel that if I do not address them all together, I will never have an opportunity to do so.
Should I have an HR representative present during the meeting? Should I meet with just my boss or also the older male coworkers? Or should I file a complaint to the company before I even do anything at all? I will definitely be recording the entire conversation regardless.
Tired of these shit people.