Fuck work so much. Since covid started my life choices have really come to hit me in the face. I am looking down the barrel at loosing my 3rd family member since this all started. I have spent all of my adult years, over a decade, playing by the rules. I worked hard. I showed up on time, stayed late, I barely took vacation, I went back to school, I started over and hustled more because that's how you get where you need to be right?
Well, now here I am with family dropping left and right and all I can think of is how I lost the time I could have spent with them, the conversations that we will never have, the alienation from my own family (because they live out of town), and the pain of not knowing how to be there for other grieving family members. I lost it and I still barely make ends meet.
This system will always keep us jumping through hoops by dangling carrots just out of reach. I am exhausted and sad. We all deserve much better than this. I wish someone had told me when I was younger to just take your vacation and your days off, call in sick on a beautiful summer day and sit in a park, call people just to hear their voices. You can do so much more good in the world doing that than hustling your way through life.
Thanks for letting me rant r/antiwork – love you forever.