Hi all
I (33F) work as a senior admin role and currently supporting a project. My colleague (mid to late 50sM) works on this project and has shown quite a liking to me but I am finding it slightly uncomfortable and unsure if it's crossing the boundaries or I am imaging things.
We've been working together in a team of 6 for about 5 months and there has been a few incidents I thought were questionable.
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Increase on queries only to me that's easily solved if he took more initiative or ask other members of the team.
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Made a weird comment I thought was off because we don't know each other that long and not established that kind working relationship. E.g he asked if I was going to spank him for doing x.y.z when he asked for my support. I retorted back saying no that's not my job(shutting that comment down)
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We had a casual convo about hobbies and he spoke about how he has been dancing (swing style) for 10 years, when it came to me I said I mainly do crafts now but I used to do martial arts and brief time body building and would like to go back one day. He kept insisted I try dancing because its similar to martial.arts but i said its not my thing. He still insisted 2-3 times before I said bluntly no thanks I really don't like dancing.
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Singing praises about me constantly although it's nice but the things I do are not exactly mind blowing, really basic stuff if I'm honest and he does infront of everyone as well.
They're are quite small incidents so no concrete evidence to take further but I still feel uncomfortable. There's a vibe I feel from him that isn't quite right.
He is a nice person but I don't see him say similar stuff to other female members of staff. I've worked with older male colleagues before and it has always been friendly and professional. Even with male colleagues I've known longer the relationships I've had inside and outside of work was always respectful. It was never flirtatous, more like mentor/older brother kind of thing. I don't like being overly friendly, unless I've worked with that person for a long time.
Since those incidents, I made sure our interactions were brief and professional. But his over reliance is causing a problem at work for me because whenever he messages me or rings me I get really anxious and tense. I have alot of pressure already with tight deadlines and high expectations it's starting to get me down. Am I being overly sensitive?