Sorry if this is long, this is not scratching the surface of problems with my job but this is the currently pressing one. I have some advice I need if that's allowed. Also I do censor the slur that they use but I feel it's important to give full context, thank you.
For a bit of context, I am an autistic person (my work does NOT know, its none of their business) working at a care facility for those with dementia and alzheimers. I have heard multiple managers use the slur “rtrd(ed)” and while this would normally already be distressing for me (I've had that word used against me even before I knew I was autistic, sometimes as a precursor to physical violence), whats even worse is we literally are meant to be caring for people with mental and cognitive degeneration.
In my opinion it is wildly unprofessional, I wouldn't want to ignore it for my own sake but even if I could, it's disgusting to me that they are dropping this at a memory care facility, even moreso when I know a lot of nursing staff (including the head of nursing) who makes fun of some of the needs of residents (who physically cannot help their symptoms) and management laughs at families behind their backs. I can't stop what anyone does at home on their own time, but seriously, can you not turn it off at work? Are you just going to absolutely explode if you can't use a well known, damaging slur? It's not even like this is a slur that not many people know is a slur, I wouldn't be so mad if it seemed like a mistake or if we didn't care for a population who is affected. (But I would still be pretty upset.)
My point to this is, I want to send an email to my direct managers and tell them that this is incredibly inappropriate, discriminatory, and unprofessional. We are not unionized at my workplace so is there any form of retaliation they could get away with? Do they even have to listen to me asking them to stop, or can they basically say “we want to keep saying so we will”? Do I have any protections, is this even actually something considered discrimination or is there any legal basis for not using slurs?
I have never even been told how to get in contact with HR and I don't believe we have anyone in HR that is actively on site, and if we do I've never seen or met them or even learned their name, so I don't know who to email or talk to other than the other managers.
Sorry about the rambling, most of my other jobs have been abusive warehouses that worsened my physical disabilities to the point I can't do physical labor anymore, so I've never dealt with trying to have my rights and comfort respected in my place of work. But they are getting extreme and this is something I really can't ignore.
TL;DR I am sick of hearing a slur thats been used agsinst me in a facility where that slur could be also utilized against most of the people under our care, but we are not unionized and I have never seen HR, so I don't want to be fired or reprimanded.