And I hate that the first thing I had to worry about was proving to work that I need to use & am entitled to Infectious Diseases Leave. I really fucking hope my manager approves it because it's all I have left; I burned through all my leave in March when I had to go sit vigil with my dad before he died, and then it took us a week to organise and carry out funeral services (3 events because Irish Catholic).
I have no regrets about spending that time with him but I'm scared about what the hell I'm going to do for the rest of the year before my leave balances build back up. And I'm resigned to the fact that Christmas is probably going to suck, because I don't have leave banked to take off the week before the holidays.
It's only May and I'm already panicking about the end of the year; there isn't even any room to contemplate a long weekend vacation.