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Antiwork

Drama llamas at work come for blood.

My new coworker is already trying to sabotage me and I am utterly beside myself. I’m a month into a new job as an event planner (a role I have 12 years’ experience in) and today my boss called me into a meeting. We chatted a bit about how my assignments were going before she told me she had heard some disconcerting things from my coworkers. I won’t go into detail about all of them, but I will tell you that about 30% of the things she told me had any merit whatsoever. One thing she brought up, though, has my Jimmies thoroughly Rustled. Cue wavy flashback music. A couple of weeks ago, I was shadowing one of my coworkers on a wedding we were catering, and in the name of fashion and formality I wore what I thought were comfortable heels. After 8 hours of walking around on concrete…


My new coworker is already trying to sabotage me and I am utterly beside myself.

I’m a month into a new job as an event planner (a role I have 12 years’ experience in) and today my boss called me into a meeting. We chatted a bit about how my assignments were going before she told me she had heard some disconcerting things from my coworkers. I won’t go into detail about all of them, but I will tell you that about 30% of the things she told me had any merit whatsoever. One thing she brought up, though, has my Jimmies thoroughly Rustled.

Cue wavy flashback music.

A couple of weeks ago, I was shadowing one of my coworkers on a wedding we were catering, and in the name of fashion and formality I wore what I thought were comfortable heels. After 8 hours of walking around on concrete floors, however, I was confronted with near-unbearable foot pain and the glaring realization that my assumptions were very, very wrong. I hobbled my way back to our staging area (completely hidden from any and all guests) to sit down, take my shoes off, and rest my weary sole(s). At one point, I padded over to my purse (still in the staging area) in my aching stocking feet before returning to my chair. I may have ventured a few more steps (still in the fucking staging area), I can’t be 100% positive, but it’s not like I was parading around the room or re-enacting that scene from I Love Lucy but with our petite filets instead of grapes.

Cue wavy flash forward music

Apparently, the planner I was shadowing felt my brief, clandestine removal of my shoes was an Egregious Violation of Intergalactic Law and needed to be reported at once. When my boss threw that in my face, I was so stunned all I could do was stare at her until she moved on to the next grossly exaggerated complaint.

Now, side note here: I will be the first to own up to my shortcomings. I have not been a perfect employee. I’d give my performance thus far a B-, which is no way to start a new job and far below the standard I set for myself. It is worth noting, however, that in the last month I moved to a new city where I don’t know anyone AND, after two and a half months spent unemployed, started a new job where there has been very little structure or training. I'm 3 for 5 with the top life stressors all at the same damn time and, though I tried to deny it, I am feeling a bit unmoored and my performance at work has reflected that.

I digress.

I asked another coworker who I worked with tonight if some of the things my manager brought up were true. We've had some honest chats before and I didn't think any of the negative comments were coming from her (she's a very straight shooter and has no problem with having hard discussions), so I trusted she would give me a straight answer. When I brought up the shoe comment and how someone apparently thought it was worth tattling on me to our boss, she looked me dead in the eye and said “not just Boss, the whole company AND the event staff at the venue

She showed me the emails.

You would have thought this was Front Page Fucking News– as if I hadn't just slipped my shoes off for a few seconds, but that I had sacrificed a baby goat in the middle of the dance floor and tried to fuck the bride's dad in the blood. There was chatter about me drafting an apology letter to the venue staff for “disrespecting the facility.” The Head of HR said she'd “get the popcorn.”

I was absolutely floored.

Now comes the uncomfortable task of going back to my manager and telling her how dismayed I am at learning that my work environment is not as positive and supportive as I thought it was. I am 33 years old and a god damn professional, I shouldn't be having to worry that my coworker is making Mt. Everest out of absolutely fucking nothing at all in an apparent effort to cut me off at the knees. Now I have to fight a battle up the most ridiculous hill ever to get back in Boss's good graces, and at the same time keep an ever-watchful eye on my proverbial back, lest another non-issue become A Big Deal.

What a day.

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