I'm through with standing in line for yachts I can't fit in
I'm eating on your dime, and I'm almost out of gin
I'm so glad health care for me is relatively free
(Tell me what you want)
I want to be in the Senate and then pass it to my kids
And a good pension plan so I can really live
And a private jet that holds twenty barely legal teens
(Uh, so what you need?)
I'll need a credit card with no ceiling
And a forwarding address for all my billing
Gonna reject your forgiveness but don't touch my PPP
(Been there, done that)
I want lobby groups to kiss my ass
And I want to cut all my taxes
A slash between 50 and 60 is fine with me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I'm gonna trade this country like its a game
I'd even pretend that I really like gays
Cause we all just wanna be big Con Stars
And have big businesses, deducting our cars
Our lines are corny, and our statements are bleak
We will all argue but be friends next week
And we'll all invest both near and far
Still denying our accounts are so large
Got a good stylist to do my hair
You can't afford treatment you don't deserve healthcare
Hey, hey, I wanna be a Con-Star
Hmm, hey, hey, I wanna be a Con-Star